Ok, so i'm 16 and going into 11th grade and I have no idea about how to meet and date other guys in high school. How can I know if someones gay and how can i date them without everyone knowing?
Hmmm you could always go for the ones that are already out or see if any of the ones still in the closet come to you?
If I were you, I'd focus on meeting other people first and then if you meet someone that you're interested in then you can take it from there. A good way to meet people in high school would be joining clubs or taking elective courses that match your interests. For example, if you like photography and there was a photography club or class you could get involved in that. If this isn't an option, you could always get involved in the community. Depending on where you live, sometimes there are groups in the community for youth to join. There are other options but these may be good ideas for you to start with. As for the dating without everyone finding out, that may be difficult in high school. Some people love gossip and spreading rumors (some people never outgrow this). If you avoid telling people about the relationship (although that can suck) and be discreet (as in no PDA etc) it will stop most people from knowing
Dating while in the closet is extremely difficult. Dating while completely in the closet, is completely impossible (unless it is straight dating). In order to date a same sex person, that person must know that you are attracted to same sex people, just necessarily. You could hang out with another gay guy every day. You could even both be madly crushing on each other. If you are both closeted, you would never know about each other, making it impossible to date. Dating would only be possible if one of you had the courage to take the leap and come out to the other one, one way or another. The more people that know that you are gay, the more likely it will be that you and another gay guy will find each other. The more you and other gay guys find each other, the more likely it will be that you and another guy will like each other enough to date. Unfortunately, life in the closet is very lonely. If there are out guys at your school, you can approach them. This would involve being out to other gay people. It is likely that other closeted people will be out to the openly gay guy. That can make it possible for you to become aware of each other. But if there is no openly gay person, you are stuck speculating about people's sexuality. Then, if there is a guy you think might be gay and into you, the only way to figure it out will be to come out to him. You can't ask about him first, or it will probably be interpreted as hostile.
