So I'm 16 and i told my dad that i think im bi. I told him that for quite some time, I've had a thing for girls and i thought they were hot. He told me that ur probably just confused and that u cant know for sure. I mean I've never had any experience with a girl but I've always been a tomboy (lame stereotype i know lol) and since grade 7 I've been looking at girls' asses and boobs (when they weren't looking hehe). Doesn't that say something? My dad told me that in time i will know who i like and then i can decide. He told me its either ur straight or ur gay. But as far as i know, i like both! Guys and girls are both sexylicious to me lol. He told me that if i ever have a problem i can talk to him bout this. So i told him bout this girl Alessia that i had a serious crush on and it was driving me crazy. He spazzed on me telling me to forget bout this person and focus on school and to stop watching so much porn! I dont know how he found that out lol. He thinks porn is making me confused when clearly im not. Idk maybe i am all i know is that i dont know if i can tell him about any more girls without him spazzing on me again. Wat do i do?
I can understand how confused you might feel because of your Dad's actions. People are creatures of information, so in that regard, we are always collecting data. These perceptions we have are called schema's. When something go's into the schema that doesnt fit with the rest of the information, it gets rejected. Only when there is enough information to confirm the new data will that schema shift. For your Dad, he has always known you as straight (as most parent see their children), and now that you have brought it to his attention that you like girls, it go's against what he has always thought of you, so now he is adjusting. For the most part it sounds like he is doing well, just try and remember that he is human and it will take him time to understand things, just like it is going to take you time to completely understand things as well. I hope that helps,
well...i can see too much porn is not beneficial...it does take up homework time. but if you were told you could talk to him, too bad he changed his mind. guess he not want you to talk like a son...haha! well, just don't talk to him then, talk somebody else. his lost opp.
I assume there were traces of the porn on whatever computer you were using. Possibly viruses. Give your dad a little more time to adjust to the idea that you like girls before talking to him in depth about crushes and things. Maybe just mention thinking various celebrities are attractive and things like that for a while, to help him adjust. Bisexuality exists. It's probably best for you if you try to stay away from more intense or extreme kinds of porn, for a few years. And don't let it interfere with your life. You are talking about liking real girls--that would not be a result of watching porn. Sometimes people are aroused by watching porn of people they are not attracted to in real life, and this can make them confused about their sexual orientation--for example, some lesbians like gay male porn, and this can make them wonder if they actually are interested in men, but no, they don't like men in real life. Thus, they are lesbians. Watching the gay male porn does not cause them to have feelings for men in real life.
well this is very helpful news i will try to stay away from extreme porn, but still people have their needs i do like girls and i do realize that i should give my dad time while i adjust to this whole situation and try to see if i can experiment with some girls a little. I'm just wondering, how could i do that?
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