So I have come out to three people. It was nice, when I came out we talked about it at that moment a little, but then nothing. With my first friend, i only saw her at church and now that its summer neither of us really go anymore. The second one is one of my best friends, but she lives like an hour away so I don't get to hang out with her a lot, and we don't text a ton. But with my cousin we text all the time, and she came to my softball game tonight, and then afterwards we got snowballs. I don't feel like I need to talk about it all that much, I probably don't know what I would say if we started talking about the fact that I was gay, but I don't know. It's just weird, I can't really explain how exactly I am feeling. I'm just A) venting and B) wondering if you talked more about it after you came out. I have no idea if any of this made sense, but I would love any comments or bits of advice.
I think I get what you mean, for me after I came out, it was just easier to be me. We don't talk about it any more or any less than when I was in the closet. Although now, friends know who I am, so when we talk about life and whatnot, they'll ask "Oh, are you seeing a guy", and blah blah blah. So, I'm more open to be who I am, and I can talk about guys I like, and things like that. My friends are very supportive, so sometimes we'll go to the gay club, and then alternate by going to the straight club. I hope I'm kind of getting what you mean. It's like this build up of coming out, and then it's like "Oh..ok?" Haha. It really isn't that big of deal. (In most cases) but, do you feel more free to talk about girls you might be crushing on with them? Or anything like that? Of course it doesn't always need to come up in conversation, it doesn't define us, but hopefully you feel a bit more free to bring up something now? Eh, hope this made sense... ^_^
yeah that seemed to get at what i attempted to articulate. Like I think the biggest thing is when i am alone with them i don't have to think about what i say ahead of time to make sure i dont let it slip. and also on like tumblr, cause only two people i actually know follow me, i don't have to censor myself.
What you're feeling now is completely how I felt! Like I felt like I got myself all worked up about it and then like no one said anything about it again for a while. I was like why don't they bring it up ever?? But I think my friends just didn't want to make me feel uncomfortable and were waiting for me to bring it up and show them that I want to talk about it.
Felt the same way..I sometimes talk about it to my best friend and me and my cousin talk about guys sometimes but she lives like 4000 miles away
Haha, I know EXACTLY what you mean xD A lot of times I'd come out to a friend and then expect a slew of questions. More often than not they've basically just said the usual "You're still the same, I support you, etc" (Haven't had any bad reactions yet, but I'm sure those'll come from the family). Afterwards they'll just continue on like nothing has changed, and won't really bring the subject itself up. Which is actually a good thing, it means it really isn't some big thing that changes how they treat me. Although they do acknowledge it still, but basically just as a fact, nothing special. Like my friend and I will nonchalantly talk about a guy we think is cute, or things like that :lol:
Yea it's sometimes rather anticlimactic, better than people freaking out over it tho . Not having to worry about "slipping up" is great however. I kinda misscheduled my talks, and would have liked to talk longer but it went rather well so far, I feel lucky to have such open-minded and supportive people in my life. Oh and yes I started with the most open-minded ones on purpose (one came out last year so it just made sense). I was expecting more questions or "well now this makes sense" or "yea you know when you did abc that time I was wondering if" comments but none of that so far. Hasn't been very long tho, gotta give people time to feel comfortable with the new you, and it's not one of the prime concerns of their daily life like it probably has been for us.
yeah i am really glad that i havent gotten any bad reactions so far, and you guys are right it did feel kinda anticlimactic. i guess its good that i havent gotten a whole slew of questions and that just means that they dont really think i am any different. it is really nice to know that other people know what i mean and sorta went through the same thing.
