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Explaining binding to friends

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Max630, Jun 23, 2012.

  1. Max630

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    Random question to anyone who binds, do any of your friends know that you do? I just dont know how to explain how I'm feeling to my friends about the whole binding thing. I don't think I'm trans, however I really have come dislike my boobs a lot. I've tried to explain it to my best friend and she has been awesome and so supportive about the whole thing, (!) but she still does not understand why I feel like there is sometihng "wrong with me". I've explained that I have always felt this way and it's just now becoming something I'd like to change and binding will help that. I currently don't bind, but I have been seriously looking into it and I think it will really help with the discomfort I have been feeling. Any ideas on how to explain it in a better way to friends? Thanks :slight_smile:
     
    #1 Max630, Jun 23, 2012
    Last edited: Jun 23, 2012
  2. Deaf Not Blind

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    I have worn sports bras and real bras, and now only bind. I have also been hugged in it. So nobody men or women have said anything.
    I am not feeling myself ANY need to tell anybody about my need to bind this weird lumps! :grin: I just do it! It is my body, and there is nothing about it that is wrong, to just make it look normal to me.
    Why do you feel a need to get approval first from all your friend? Is it a fear that they will ask later why you are not sticking out?
    Honestly, I wear it to church, my mom not even question me!
    Unless you are DDD, I don't think you need to worry, just buy a good binder, research. I got mine at loveboat.com, love it, it is way more comfy than a sports bra and not fall off the shoulder like a stupid girl bra. So if you need an excuse tell them it is comfy, quality, and you can catch a football and jog better without the bumpers.
     
  3. Max630

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    I totally get what you're saying. I'm not really looking for her approval, I'm just looking for a way to explain it. She is someone I completely trust and we basically tell each other everything. She has helped me a lot as I keep questioning and I just want her to understand what I've been feeling lately.
    Thanks for the link too!
     
  4. BradThePug

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    Humm.. this is a hard one.

    I would try telling her how you feel and why you feel that way. That can be hard to do but it will probably be the only thing that will work effectively.
     
  5. Deaf Not Blind

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    sure no prob!

    just say if you had a fatty tumor, even if it is benign, if it was in a noticeable place that got in the way and you couldn't help but see daily, you would not be thrilled everyone looks at it.
     
  6. wandering i

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    Sorry to revive this but I think my take might be helpful.

    I recently had to explain why parts of my appearance are problematic to a friend, and I described it this way. I asked, "Have you ever worn something that looks cool on its own, and you can imagine it looking amazing on someone else, but it just does not suit you at all?"
    Most people understand this feeling.

    That's how I feel when I look at myself in the mirror or see my own body because certain physical aspects of me do not line up with how I feel in my mind, and how I wish others saw me.

    Even if your friend doesn't understand, please let her know you are lucky to have someone you can talk about such issues with, and it is okay if she doesn't understand, because she respects you and your choice and that is very important.