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Seriously?!

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by sepphhyy, Jun 26, 2012.

  1. sepphhyy

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    Is there no guy out there who doesn't just want something physical with me?! Do people really think that I'll just give it up whenever they ask?

    I'm so sick of having guys treat me like a piece of meat. There's more to me than my body and face.

    I really hope that I can find someone that will ask me out, without me having to do them a "favor" first.

    This is just a rant really, but if you have anything to say, feel free to post something.

    Sepphhyy
     
  2. BudderMC

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    Wait, why can't you ask them out? Obviously the guys showing interest in you are not the ones you want. Maybe it's time to take some initiative and go after the ones you want?
     
  3. sepphhyy

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    I've tried that and I get the same result.
     
  4. Epipleptic

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    Don't get frustrated. To put positive spin on your problem, you get to find out very quickly what people to avoid.

    Where are you meeting these people? If it's a bar or club maybe find other places to go, or at least not bars or clubs exclusively. If it's not, giving more details might be helpful.
     
    #4 Epipleptic, Jun 26, 2012
    Last edited: Jun 26, 2012
  5. dano22

    dano22 Guest

    I know exactly what you mean. It's like losing my virginity is no big deal but its a big deal to me. I am gonna wait for the right guy to come along and I don't care if I have to wait until I am thirty.
     
  6. sepphhyy

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    I'm on like a bunch of dating websites, so I get messages from these people. I've only been to a gay club once so far, and nobody hit on me, because I was with a big group of people.
     
  7. Neutrality

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    I can't speak for everyone but, the most I give on a first date is a small kiss. I'm certainly looking for a long term relationship...I really don't even want to sleep with a guy until we've been dating a while...so we do exist!
     
  8. Epipleptic

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    It looks like dating sites are not working the way you want. I don't know how long you've been on them so consider for yourself how long you want to keep getting these messages against your willingness to keep waiting for it to work. In the mean time look for any clubs, social groups, sport teams or whatever else you might be interested in to meet people in person. While they not may not immediately lead to a relationship, you may eventually meet someone who you'd like to date.
     
  9. sepphhyy

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    Exactly, I'm not about to have sex with some random guy. I really thought that it would make me more confident, but so far it's only mad me feel like crap. Now don't get me wrong I'm an extremely confident person, so I don't need the boost, but it's still upsetting to think that guys only want me for my body.
     
  10. Epipleptic

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    Why did you feel the need to be made more confident? (you don't have to answer this question or the others in a post) What are your friendships like? What's the rest of your social life like? Do you have gay friends (I don't have any close ones myself)? Why do you want a relationship? I hope asking yourself those questions will help.

    Also, it's not that guys want you for your body it's that those guys want you for your body. But you know what? You're in control and you don't have to associate with them. Choose people who value you on what you want to be valued for.
     
  11. sepphhyy

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    I'm confident in the fact that I know I look good, and that I'm comfortable with my body. I'm just not as confident when it comes to thinking that OTHER people find me attractive. It sounds weird, I know. I don't have many friends. I have one really good friend, and she's straight. She's not outgoing so when I want to try something new, like going to a gay club, she won't do it. I do have one gay friend, but he's not so concerned about who he's having sex with. And I want a relationship because I'm just tired of being alone. It just seems like everyone around has someone to call their own, and I don't. I don't know, maybe that's a stupid answer. Another reason is because I feel that I'm ready to share my life with someone.

    And just so you know, I haven't had sex with any of those guys. I just block them so they can't message me anymore.

    I'm not sure if you wanted an answer to your questions, but I did it anyway.

    Sepphhyy
     
  12. Gen

    Gen
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    Are you in school? A social job?

    Basically, how often are your around people? Because you'll never make more friends(who can help you meet more people) or potential partners if your not around people. Dating sites are truthfully not a good way to meet people for ANY sex or orientation. You have to make sure your are around people frequently though if your want to meet someone easily. Whats your occupation? (Generally)
     
  13. sepphhyy

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    I'm a visual merchandiser, so I work in retail. It's not a social job. I usually just work with one other person.
     
  14. Epipleptic

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    Gen got to the heart of the issue. You need friends first. And through those friends you'll (ideally) meet other people you might be able to date. I say start interacting with people in person. Look for LGBT social activities in your area.