I know the simplest way of getting over someone is to distance yourself from them if all else fails. But what if that's virtually impossible? Allow me to explain a little more... I've developed feelings for a 16-year old girl I do horseback riding with. After giving it some thought I felt she reminded me of my first girlfriend when I was her age but now... I fail to see those qualities. I'm actually starting to become a little annoyed at her. Perhaps we've been spending too much time together. And she IMs me daily too and doesn't seem to know when to stop. It's frustrating. There's a DVD she wants the two of us to watch together sometime but I've been thinking up excuses not to. I really want to see it but just not with her. Not at her house. I don't know how I'm going to get out of that one. Probably won't. But the biggest concern is distancing myself from her. It's impossible since we always see each other at the stable yard. I think the crush will wear off on its own though. As soon as I meet someone else. Someone I have more in common with, and who is closer to my age, or even older! Someone who is independent, not needy and insecure and someone who knows when to give me some breathing space! Guess this is more than a rant than anything else...
Concentrate on how annoying she is, and remind yourself of those qualities when you are having inappropriate feelings about her. That will help.
You don't perhaps have advice on how to distance myself from her? That's the thing I have the most trouble with and I don't know what to do. As both of us have horses at the yard it'll be hard to not go there for a while, and changing the times I go will also be hard. I know she doesn't go there on Saturdays, so that's already a bonus for me, and I could always try to go then instead of Sundays, though I won't see my other friends, since most of them go there on Sundays...... Also, how do I tell her in a gentle way that I think we should put riding during the week aside for a little while? It's fun having someone to ride with and much safer, but she's just too much. To be honest, I'd rather ride by myself again, doing my own thing at my own pace than have to take her into consideration... :bang: I guess the main problem I have is having to taxi her around. We've got a "halfway" spot where we always meet up and load her things into my or their car so that helps but still. The time spent waiting is time I could've used travelling home. Guess I'm just being a total drama queen about everything and trying to find fault in simple things
yeah sounds like you are trying to distance yourself mentally bu finding fault and exaggerating it to not feel. physically, change phone # not tell her, do plan for switch to saturdays, and do tell her! why? cuz i think peeps have distanced from me a lot and it is obvious at some point, which makes me want to go after them and try to make them like me...not hate me...which further makes them shun me. and shunning is like punishment, painful. so unless she is evil, be a bigger person and not act childish...sit down in private flat out say what things have bothered you so she can fix that in future friendships and then don't be friends. painful yes, but clearly understood closure for you both. unfriended.
