Hello EC, I dont think I ever got a chance to formally introduce myself. My name is Raiden, i'm 15 and gay. I have contemplated coming out to my mother because I feel she has a right to know, but I have some worries. She is a JW and highly homophobic. On top of that she is diagnosed with bipolar disirder and depression and also has a number of other medical conditions. She is highly religious and I worry that she will disown me if she finds out about my being gay. I dont really express how I feel but i am not passive aggressive with my frustrations, her and my father recently got a divorce and I dont think it is a good time to come out and cause her added stress, but I am also growing tired of her constant gay jokes and homophobia and it is eating away at me.. Based on this which way would be my best shot coming out to her..
Hi sweetie welcome firstly let me say im sorry about everything your going through is there any trusted adults you can tell right now ? i think it would be best to get it off your chest
I dont really know any trusty adults, my friends usually go "aww thats awful i feel bad". So I guess you guys are my trusted adults and 2nd family
No, I dont really think a therapist or social worker would be of much help, coming out to my mom isn't that urgent so I can wait until im 18 and financially independant..
Since you think you can wait until you're 18 to come out, it probably is a good idea to wait. Right now you're dependent on her for material support; if she cuts that off, needless to say, you'll be in a tough spot. If all else fails, will you be able to live with your dad? It's always good to have a backup plan. Once school starts again, you might be able to talk to a counselor or teacher at your school. Being out to your friends and coming here will help a lot in coping with your situation, but it would still be useful to have an adult you can talk to.
That is a tough situation, I really hope that it will get better for you. I had wondered, have you come out to your father? I personally don't think it would be a good idea to come out to your mom just yet, like the above posters say, since you are dependant on her at the moment. It would be a better idea to wait until you are moved out and living on your own. I would suggest trying to talk to someone about how you're feeling, it really does feel 100 times better when you can talk to someone who will listen, or who has gone through these kinds of things themselves!
It looks like you have a tough situation at home for coming out and I think you should wait until you feel its the right time to tell your family. However make sure you're out to other people and talk to other people about how you feel so you can keep your head up and not get too down about whatever your mom might say. Good luck and we're here for you.
Hello! First of all, I am Ramon, from Brazil, and the most important an EX JW! Well, I've never got baptized, but did preaching my whole life, even without really wanting it! Let me ask you, Are you going to the meetings? If yes I know how you feel inside there, you often hate yourself, you feel like an abomination, so as they say! I've passed through it all, and I just recently got over it! Well can't say much since i don't know if you actually went to meetings, or is your mom only, that goes! But, I can say now, that thinking those things about yourself will not help! Will only worsen things! And about your question... What I can see about the whole situation, It is not a good time to come out, Shes mentally injured right now, about everything that is happening, and if you said this now, it would be like a nuke in her head! I know how its hard to hold it to yourself, trust me I know! But if you think you can please wait a bit more! Enough said, I will w8 your answer about your status right now so I can go deeper in this discussion! Hope you be well, and we are between friends here so feel comfortable to say anything that bothers you, its a good thing to relief some of the pressure!
