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Mum in denial

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by PurpleDinosaur, Jul 7, 2012.

  1. PurpleDinosaur

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    So my mother has basically been in denial since I came out to her and yesterday I asked her if she could start using male pronouns and calling me Ayden (my preferred name). She said she would think about it which was the best response I've ever gotten from her about anything LGBTQA. Today she said she couldn't do it which was expected but whatever.
    She also said when I'm twenty and I still feel that I'm a boy then we can do something. She said that my whole life I've always been very girly so she doesn't believe that I'm actually a boy for one second. I have never been girly and she's ignoring the facts. I told her that it'll be a lot harder for me to live years like this then transition when I'm twenty but she just won't listen. Any advice?
     
  2. BurritoQueer

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    In my opinion, you may just have to find another gay person that you like & maybe kiss him Infront of your mother. Go with stereotypes and maybe have high fashion sense? I'm not exactly sure how to help.
     
  3. dasazn

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    Well, you seem to be in a decent position - your mother hasn't threatened to throw you out of the house/beat you/send you to a psychiatrist/other horrible things that could happen. If she's in denial, I think the best thing would be to just ignore her and live as a man. If all of your friends see you as a guy, and everyone treats you as a guy, she won't be able to ignore the facts anymore.

    Granted, getting a new wardrobe and stuff may be tricky, so you might want to start with some guy friends first - since you're genetically female, you're probably smaller in size than most guys and could probably take some of their older clothes and such. Also, there's not much your mother can do if you cut your own hair or have a friend do it for you for free.
     
  4. midnightvanity6

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    I agree with dasazn, just ignore her if she doesn't believe you, and continue to dress/act like a guy, after all it's who you are, if she can't accept you, that's her problem.