I have been thinking about this a lot. Every day I come more comfortable with who I am. I am currently not in a relationship with a girl but dating a man. But it seams every day I want everyone who I am close with to know about my sexual orientation. My family dosnt really know, my sister knows that I have been in love with a girl before... My dad joked about ne starting to date a girl after a messy break up to make the man feel worse (just a joke, i don't see him being a judgemental person..... I don't think) my mom is very accepting... Yet I'm worried about saying I'm bi. I know who I am but I wonder if its important to say it if I'm not dating a girl... Or would it be better before I started dating someone so it wouldn't come as a shock when I did. My parents are LDS and believe in God. My mom knows I'm atheist, my dad has heard but that's something I haven't talked to him about... I'm the o:icon_redfnly atheist in my family, yet its been a long time since that came out and I don't feel like it mattered. They accept that I make good choices and am a good person. Yet I'm not sure how they would react.... So how does everyone feel?
There is no law that says you must come out. It is a choice. You come out because you want to lead an open and honest life. You come out so you don't have to hide who you are from others. You come out to be your authentic self, and knowing that there will be some people who will not accept you for who you are. It is a choice. It isn't something someone can tell you that you should or must do. Only you can decide whether you want it for yourself or not, and if you do, you must be prepared to face the difficulties that come your way.
I don't think it's that important to come out if you're bisexual. When I considered myself bi I never came out . But I did come out as gay later.
It's not important to come out when you're Bisexual. If you feel like you really want to come out as a Bi female, then do it of you would like. Where as if you became a full lesbian- you're more expected to come out so you can live your relationship part of your life.
Still worried, I felt so good yesterday and wanted the world to know. This morning I feel less confidence... :-( not sure why. :-(
Like Aldrick said, it really is a personal choice that most people must make for themselves. I personally think its very important for everyone to be able to be authentic and be themselves completely in order to be happy and connect to others. That also includes your sexual orientation whether you are bi, gay, straight or asexual. But with that being said, coming out is a hard process that most people do it gradually. Start with one person at a time and go at your own pace.
It's normal to have your emotions go up and down. What's important is that you don't put too much stock in it. Don't beat yourself up by calling yourself a coward or things like that. Understand, there is no pressure here. Any pressure you are experiencing is self-created. Coming out is about being authentic with yourself, it's about learning to love who you are on the inside. Beating yourself up goes contrary to that goal. At some point, if you want to come out, you're going to have to swallow the fear and jump. It's scary because it's unknown and different. You can't control the reactions of others, and because you can't control them, your mind fills up with 'What If' questions. "What if they don't accept me?" "What if they treat me differently?" "What if they get angry?" "What if I'm wrong, and there is just something wrong with me?" All of those are common doubts, and I am sure you have enough to fill an entire book. And a little secret, the more you think about it and dwell on it, the more "What If" questions are going to come up. What it boils down to is shame, which is the fear of losing your connection with other people. The core "What If" question is this: "What if after they discover who I really am, they don't love me anymore?" The problem is that this is the wrong question to ask. The correct question to ask is, "How can anyone truly love me for who I am, if I hide who I really am from them?" Right now, at this very moment, they can't love you because you aren't letting them. They love who you are pretending to be. You know you are pretending, and that you're wearing a false persona - a mask. That is why you are afraid. It is why you feel shame and fear. "Will they love me after I remove the mask?" Is not the question you need to ask. The question is, "How can they love me now, right at this very moment, when all I let them see is the mask?"
