so i'm proud to say that I've already come out to my closest friends, and although a couple of them are quite homophobic, they were all very accepting. it was a big sigh of relief for me, I didn't have to pretend like I had a crush on a guy or that I was even interested. but I've found that they all seem a bit award whenever I try to bring something up about women in general. it's not like I say anything especially weird, it's more like they just ignore the fact that i'm gay entirely. they always say things like "don't turn all flamboyant on is" and I would find being that way uncomfortable for me, but am I not supposed to ever bring it up? because that's the sort of message they give me. I feel so lonely since their the only ones I can openly talk to, yet i'm not able to. I don't know what to do right now.
I'm in the same situation. My best friend has no idea what I went (/ kind of am still going) though, so when I talk to her about it, she puts up this wall that I can't talk past. I think it's mainly that they just genuinely don't get it. Like... They can't understand you being a lesbian. Don't take it hurtfully, and talk to them about how it feels like you're being pushed out. Good luck, King x
I kinda have the same problem with my straight male friends. We never talk about our emotions or crushes or anything too deep, much less about LGBT topics, and whenever they talk about girls, I feel a little left out. Like King said, I think it's because they don't get it. For example, months after I came out to them, one of them asked me why I had chosen to be gay :dry: I had to explain to him that it's not a choice and that I was born like that. However, it's entirely different with my straight female friends. We can talk about guys, and they sometimes bring up LGBT topics.
My best friend's the same way. If I try to talk to him about this kind of stuff, he makes a quick comment and changes the subject immediately. I just don't think straight guys or gals "get" it really. Not sure how to handle it. As a result, I part of me doesn't consider my best friend the 'best'. I feel as if the first straight friend I that is comfortable enough to talk with me about this stuff without getting weird or uncomfortable will take on that role.
Friends are awesome but they suck at the same time. My friends always give me crap and make me feel uncomfortable in groups, but I know if I ever talked to them one on one they have my back. I have one friend that keeps trying to convince me not to go places because there are "homophobic f*ggots there..." Irony at its finest if you ask me.
lmao :lol: yes, yes that is irony at it's finest, for sure I can also relate, most straight people really don't get it at all... which is why I enjoy my (new and few and far between, but that's slowly changing!) LGBT friends so much more right now!! Although, I do have one friend who happens to be straight, and she has never asked me to stop talking - in fact, I caught myself going on about a crush and about coming out of the closet at our last visit, and I apologized for it because I knew most of my straight friends get uncomfortable if I talk that much about lesbian stuff, and she was like "you never have to apologize or censor yourself around me. you feel free to talk about whatever is important to you." So, some straight people are just awesome and maybe don't "get it" per say, but also don't get all awkward and uncomfortable whenever LGBT topics come up, either. However, I (of course) still feel the most connected to (haha because I'm crushing on her, or because she's the best friend I've ever had? maybe because of both!) this one woman who has almost 0 tolerance for being able to listen when I start talking about lesbian stuff, she gets super uncomfortable and then says something along the lines of not understanding why I care so much and insisting that no one else cares even a little... :/
How long ago did you come out to them? If it was recent maybe they just need more time to get used to the idea. At first it's probably going to be a raw subject that they don't know what to say about. I'm guessing after a while though it will be less of a big deal. My advice would be just keep doing what you're doing and they'll get used to it.
I came out to them when school was just ending do maybe just a few months ago. now that I think about it I think your right. maybe it just needs time or maybe I just need lgbt friends thank u everyone who responded <3
One of my best friends is the same way. Every time I mention liking or a guy or something he either changes the subject, tells me to stop talking about it, or just ignores me. It is frustrating because it's like you're supposed to be my best friend so I should be able to talk to you about this.
I've actually met several messed up homophobic faggots. So either your friend is quite wise, and has your best interest in mind (if he wants to keep you away from dangerous places) or utterly stupid.
