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Old 21st Jul 2012, 01:21 PM   #1
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Default insecure girls!

just a rant/vent really.

i have a lot of friends who are guys but ive lost contact/friendship with most because of their girlfriends. im a lesbian i dont want your boyfriend trust meeee!
ughhhh!

we barely talk because they arent 'allowed' to talk. they arent allowed to talk to any girl regardless of sexuality or whatever. i know its their problem but he was my friend before he was your stupid boyfriend!

anyone been in a similar situation? its annoying!!
its just making me really sad because i dont have any friends hardly anymore.

sorry i just had to vent.
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Old 21st Jul 2012, 01:33 PM   #2
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Default Re: insecure girls!

I sorry you feel like your losing friends .

But I know exactly how you feel. Granted guys usually arent as crazy with their girlfriends(atleast the ones I know). But, my god let someone know your gay and you must be a serial rapist or something. And I dont mean to be rude, but its always the people that you would never find attractive that think you must be obsessed with them. Its like no people I dont want you or your man/women, get over yourself >_>.
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Old 21st Jul 2012, 03:30 PM   #3
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Default Re: insecure girls!

Sorry that their girlfriends are such assholes about it

I wasn't in that exact situation. But my ex-boyfriend was jealous like those girls. He didn't want me to talk to my guy friends, because he didn't trust them. And apparently he didn't trust me either. So I broke up with him. I don't get people like that...
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Old 21st Jul 2012, 03:39 PM   #4
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Default Re: insecure girls!

I was never one of those girls, but I saw him at Tim Hortons with a girl friend of his and I had no problem with it - they have been friends for forever, and I was not about to come between that. He messaged me later though explaining that his friend was pretty much his sister and such. So yeah, I do not understand relationships where one person is manipulated into staying away from their old friends.
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Old 22nd Jul 2012, 10:33 AM   #5
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Default Re: insecure girls!

Something I've learned - the hard way unfortunately - is that when one person in a relationship is insecure to the point where they suspect the other one is cheating on them, they themselves are the ones standing behind the door...

I'm going through a similar situation with one of my male friends. He's really and truly like the brother I never had and we were very close. Until he went and got with this girl who nobody in the family likes, she's dumb as a rock (wait, can't insult a rock like that!) and she's really immature, insecure and possesive. He's not allowed to come over for coffee without her because she doesn't trust the two of us together I guess. Honestly, we've tried the dating thing and it didn't work for us. We decided to be good friends and we've even slept next to each other in the same bed once and nothing happened. That's how close we are, and how we see each other: FRIENDS - NO benefits.

Ok, that was before he got the girlfriend but still. I guess what I'm trying to say is, it's always hard seeing friendships suffer because of a jealous/insecure partner.

I wish you all the best and hope things get sorted and hope their eyes are opened soon so they can see what their current relationships are doing to the friendship. I for one will definitely listen to my friends if they told me the person I'm with is not doing anybody any good. Even if it breaks my heart to hear it. You say you hardly talk but why not try to meet them somewhere and discuss this with them, or even a quick phonecall?
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Old 22nd Jul 2012, 11:02 AM   #6
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Default Re: insecure girls!

Well that is really stupid! Why don't the guys do anything about it? Geez! It's like the Overly Attached Girlfriend!
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Old 22nd Jul 2012, 12:08 PM   #7
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Default Re: insecure girls!

I find that sort of behavior highly disturbing, borderline abusive, actually, as it isolates the partner being told to abandon half of their friends (or more if the partner's bisexual). Unfortunately, I don't think there's much you can do about it at this point.
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Old 22nd Jul 2012, 12:37 PM   #8
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Default Re: insecure girls!

velvet im always one to be really blunt and flat out say of things arent right and they have heard this over and over from me but do nothing. i dont blame them it is their relationship and i understand i cant come between them. but still i still want a quick phonecall/chat once in a while but no hardly ever lucky if its once every 3 months

even if its with their s/o in tow if we met up for a coffee or something i wouldnt mind but no. still not allowed.

ive tryed theres nothing i can really do though.

---------- Post added 22nd Jul 2012 at 08:38 PM ----------

mogget - even family is out of the question of contact some of the time so yeah... it is isolating for them. :\
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Old 22nd Jul 2012, 01:22 PM   #9
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Default Re: insecure girls!

Two to tango...
There's probably a bit of insecurity in those guys' perspective as well. Otherwise why would they listen to everything the girlfriend demands without questioning any of it (not allowed to see your long-time friends? huh?)? Maybe they're so afraid of being dumped or being single that they do "whatever it takes" to keep that girlfriend, or any girlfriend?
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Old 22nd Jul 2012, 03:34 PM   #10
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Default Re: insecure girls!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Night Rain View Post
Well that is really stupid! Why don't the guys do anything about it? Geez! It's like the Overly Attached Girlfriend!
Yup, exactly how I would've put it Sadly, there are so many immature/ insecure girls out there that you can't throw a stick without hitting one anymore *facepalm*
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Old 22nd Jul 2012, 10:24 PM   #11
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Default Re: insecure girls!

Yep, but to be fair, I'm also a very competitive friend. My best friend is a guy and whenever he's dating a girl, it's full on psychological warfare, from forgetting her name to making him cancel plans with her. It's never relationship-threatening, and he does the same thing when I'm dating someone.
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Old 22nd Jul 2012, 10:39 PM   #12
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Default Re: insecure girls!

Okay, I'm not going to lie. I'm a girl. All of my best friends are guys. When they get new girlfriends, I test those skanks . The ones who are okay with giving us our space as friends and who realize that they are dating my guy friend and that they do not own him, those girls get my stamp of approval. There haven't been very many, though =/. It's really unfortunate when you know a guy friend will put up with that. All you can really do is tell him what she's doing and know that love blinds. We've (almost?) all been there. He'll wake up to it one day and you should be there to give him a hug and tell him it's okay (but of course that you hope he's learned from it!) when that does happen.
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