Friend's Curiosity

[Andytx1]

Recently I moved in to live with a gay friend. He knows that I'm bi and has a GF but she's away for now. Anyway, recently, we started grabbing my arm and hand and rubs it gently/holds it... I was on his bed last night and he put his arm around me and hugged me like he was cuddling a teddy bear. I think he likes me but when people ask he refers to me as a "friend who likes to cuddle but nothing more". Anyways I'm confused now.. he does have a boyfriend but it's not working out really well.

He probably does like you, but he's using the "Friend who likes to cuddle with but nothing more" as a cover up.

[Andytx1]

What do I do then? o-o he denies a lot of things

[silverhalo]

Well unless you are thinking of getting rid of your girlfriend and him his boyfriend perhaps you could just tell him that you dont think its appropriate when you both have partners.

[Andytx1]

Is there a chance he doesn't like me but is just being friendly?

[xramonx]

Well the borders of being too friendly have passed isn't it? Don't know about you but I don't really think it's just being friendly

[Andytx1]

But I'm usually affectionate around him.. I like to lie on his shoulder etc ... So maybe he's returning the flavor with no intentions? I'm confused

[Andytx1]

Also ... When he's horny and I ask of he needs help he always say no

[stumble along]

I don't understand what you are asking?
That if he likes you? If so then I would say maybe, if the other boyfriend isn't going well then maybe he's looking at you for his next attempt.

Also, you are inciting this by asking if he needs help when he's horny, try to not do that and maybe everything else will return to normal goofing off.

[BudderMC]

I'd actually say he's just wanting to be close to someone. One of my close guy friends likes to snuggle up with people even though he has girlfriend. Him and my other friend were on my bed laying beside each other (while I was in the kitchen, talking from a distance) and I actually asked him. He just said that honestly, sometimes it's nice to feel close to another person, to feel the warmth of another body.

He's never done it with me, presumably because I'd never go for it, but he's done it with another gay guy friend of ours before. Generally girls more often than not though.

My friend might be the minority in this case, I don't know, but it's not completely unheard of was the point.

The issue arises when you or he want to progress further than that, into something more intimate/sexual. You need to set some ground rules for yourself right now on how far you're willing to go, so even if your judgement gets clouded in the "heat of the moment", you can make the choice that's right for you. If either if you are in a relationship, I'd say you shouldn't be going anywhere, but that's not my choice to make.

[Andytx1]

Also ... He keeps showing me his horny sexting conversations with other guys .. Idk what es trying to do XD

[Bobbgooduk]

I'm a bit confused so I'm not surprised you both are!

For me, affection and cuddles are not the same as sex. I can hug my women and kiss them and they know I don't want to jump in bed with them. I also have straight male friends (and my son) with whom I share physical contact - hugs, shoulder-slapping. Admittedly I don't rest my head on their shoulders.

I think your friend is asking you to clarigy the situation. You have a girlfriend and yet you're "offering help" when he's horny. That sounds like YOU want to get intimate with him.

Perhaps he just wants to be sure WHAT your game is - do you want both of you to carry on with your respective partners, or do YOU want to take this friendship further?

You have to admit, you're giving the poor guy pretty confused messages - don't lead him on if you don't mean to, be honest with yourself AND him about how you'd like it to be.

It could be he's not interested anyway - he has refused your "offer" of help so far.

That sound to me like he's quite a serious and honourable guy.

Put him out of his misery and confusion!

---------- Post added 26th Jul 2012 at 09:58 PM ----------

clarify!

[Andytx1]

Oh I guess your right .. He lets me touching him with clothes on but refuses to go any further... But yeah he likes to hold me really tight.