So it is 4 in the morning... my mom just left my apartment in tears. Apparently i have been kicked out of the closet by my older sister. She showed up at about 2 and i thought she had showed up 2 c if she could catch me drunk... i didnt drink tonight. But no we sit down and she just salms me with " so your sister tells me you are gay" Throughout the conversation she expressed her refusal to except that it was final and is adamant that i go to a shrink so that we can " fix me." Then apparently my sister also spilled the beans on my suicidal past becuase for the longest she said that she wouldnt leave me alone. All i can say is that i am an emotional wreck right now i have so much hatred for my sister... fear of my parents and God knows every other emotion running right now i think i am about to have an overload. She told me that i was in no way supposed to mistreat my sister that she did it out of love in hopes that maybe she wasnt to late. I feel so betrayed. my sis was my amigo. My best friend and my partner in crime, and she just totally took that and threw that all away.
Arg. That sounds terrible. In regards to your sister, I'd say let her tell her why she did it before you yell and scream at her. Personally, I can't think of anything she could say that would excuse what she did, but... I don't know. I always think it's better to know, anyway. Also, don't let your mother push you into doing something you don't want to do. That's just my worldly wisdom anyway, which probably it's that wise (or worldly). *hugs*
PM me with your address and I'll send PFLAG materials (and information on how reparative therapy has been deemed unethical by every major medical, psycholgical, psychiatric, and pediatric organzition in the U.S.) for your mom immediately. Neither your sister or your mom understand this and are acting on fear and emotions. Try to forgive your sister for outing you. Hang in there and just keeping talking to your mom.
Take beckys advice please. Thats damn terrible... Seriously. I feel sorry for you and we really need to know why your sister said!
i'm so so so so sorry that you're family believes they have to "fix" u and that you were outed by your sister. ask for the materials from becky-they might make it easier for your family to understand.
That's really awful. Your mum obviously doesn't realize that she can't just 'fix you'. Follow becky's advice, definitely.
I feel so bad that anyone has to go through this crap. It was only made worse by your sister being the one to out you, I'm sure. I would go along with your mom's plan to see a Psychiatrist, because most don't try to fix gays (since homosexuality is NOT a mental or physical illness), and hope that you see an understanding one who will talk to your mom. Hoping for the best! (*hug*)
(*hug*) Maybe your mum was treating your sister like crap too and forced it out of her? Or maybe your sister genuinely thought she was trying to help and it all went horribly wrong? From how you describe your sister there, I don't think she would have done this out of spite. Can you contact your sister somehow and find out what led up to this mess? That may help to make things clearer, and it may well be that your sister is on your side in all this.
:icon_sad: That is horrible! I hope things get better and your mom realizes there is nothing she can do to change you!
I totally agree. You don't want to make anything worse, and trying to reconcile might make it better.
I'm really sorry that you were 'outed' before you were ready to be. That's just not fair. Obviously your sister doesn't understand what it's about or how you've been feeling. I'm sure they both really care about you though - try to remember that. The bright side - you no longer have to dread that discussion with you mom, telling her you're gay. She already knows.
I'm really sorry and hope things get better. I'm really sorry it had to happen that way too - completely out of your control. But I hope that if you take Becky's advice, or even if you don't, that your mum sees that she can't change you - but that she can accept you for who you are. Good luck.
oh boy, this happened to me once they hold you hostage so youll do whatever they want you to do. just go to the shrink if your mom wants you to cause she is clearly not acepting of it, but when they talk about you being gay, change the subject to matters that are more prominent to you like your past. dont let the sister part get you, its not the earthquake that hurts, its the aftershocks
