its a long story....we met a year ago on a camping trip through a friend. i am openly gay and he is obviously straight. he has a a crazy past that he told me about one night when it was just us at the campfire. and his past is crazy. were only 21 btw. but over the past year we became inseparable for whatever reason. and we have become so close. he's straight ,single and has a baby on the way. about 4 months ago we were camping and it was really cold so he cuddled with me. we joked about it he claimed it was an accident. well every time we sleep in the same bed we cuddle now sometimes really intimate.he has no problem with me being gay we tell each other ever detail of our sex life. he always wants to hear more. he always touches me but makes it like discreet. mind u i just came out the closet right before we met so i know the signs of it. but i cant figure him out. well he just got a gf. we were talking about it being all happy and stuff. he randomly blurts out, we cant cuddle anymore i have a gf. i said why would that matter its not sexual your straight. he goes but im not a cheater. so that confused me right there. so we did this thing were he tough me to look at girls and what to look at so i did that with him but with guys. so we have this thing with bulges. he knows i look at his and he loves it he always asks me if he looks good, smells good and whatever. but i always notice hi m looking at my bulge like when im in my underwear or basketball shorts. and when im laying on my stomach he looks at my butt. is he looking just to look or because he likes it...sometimes we wrestle like normal wrestle. and of course i get the "roll of pennies in my pants" as he calls it. he's aware it happens and i think he trys to make it happen . or so i think. last night we were wrestling and he put his face on it . acting like he didn't realize it like for a min.. but then i try to cuddle with him now and he wont. but he a genuine guy does not cheat or even anything close. so i dnt get it. if it was "just cuddling" like he says then why would it be sexual. so back to lst night. hes a straight guy obv. so he sticks his hands down his pants to adjust. but last night in his basket ball shorts laying on my bed he did it like 5 times in 10 min. but like 3 out of them he was sticking his penis in a position to be completely noticeable. like sticking up or to the side so u can see the size. so i pretend not to notice. but does he want me to notice. or even worse what if he really didn't notice and he's just comfortable doing that.he always tells me he's just very comfortable with his sexuality.and thts why he can cuddle me and touch me. so heres my issue... is he. is this all in my head. i would never make the first move...is he curious. or am i a creepy psycho. [/FONT][/FONT]
Im goin thru the same exact thing i th ---------- Post added 1st Aug 2012 at 08:12 AM ---------- I think he jus scared or sum
He's probably curious, but doesn't want to risk his girlfriend and his kid to be. He'd like to experiment, but he wants you to start it so he has an excuse if you get caught. I wouldn't recommend doing that. It's not worth the potential of losing a close friend, if that's what you want him to be. If you want him as more, I don't know what you should do. Be careful anyway. Don't do anything rash.
I also think he is curious, but i think that if you still have feelings from him you should ask him, maybe he could feel uncomfortable but you will never know! :S
Okay he's gay/bi... I'm sure sraight guys don't do that. I mean some apparently jackoff together, but cuddling and stuffing there face in another mans *? I mean if he were curious idk if it would go on for that long. But you seriously need to talk to him straight up.
I agree with this 100%. With everything he has told you and with his kid and gf, it wouldn't make sense to assume he is gay. A good general rule is to always assume guys are straight unless they tell you otherwise. It would be dangerous to ruin a good friendship (assuming it still is in spite of all this going on) by bringing something like that up when he isn't ready to hear it/talk about it. While he could very well be gay and just scared of everything that comes along with that, we tend to see things that aren't there when we like someone. If that's the case, don't feel bad, we all do it. But definitely agree with "be careful".
thank you all for the relpies. umm at the end of the day i would never want to risk loosing him( i love him) lol but most days im happy and ok with it because i still have him there everyday. hes amazing tho. haha. but yea i wouldnt want to ruin it i just needed to vent and clear my mind. hopefully he will make a move but like looking outside the box he gonna end up marrying a girl nd im gonna be his best man so i need to lear to deal with it or move on. but i dont know what my mind wants sometimes i dont see the big pic. like tonight more stuff happened that make my mind go there i dont know how to stop my mind. ughhh
Maybe it would help if you stayed clear of physical stuff with him for a while? At least until you have had a chance to clear your mind, evaluate your friendship with him from a perspective that doesn't involve him essentially "leading you on". Everytime something happens its just gonna make you question and be more confused. I think if next time something starts to happen you back off, he might get the message that maybe what you are doing isn't fair to you. This might help you move on too. Not from being friends with him, but from this particular aspect anyways. Then you can work on a healthier friendship with him that will work down the road.
Is he a good, decent guy? I guess he is or you wouldn't be friends with him. So I don't think he's tormenting you on purpose. Which leads me to believe he's at least curious, and it's nice that he feels safe enough with you to feel curious. The problem comes, though, from the fact that you really love him and want desperately for things to go further. It's perfectly possible that this could happen, but there are other considerations like his future wife and child. I wouldn't reject his feeling of security with you. Personally, if he just wanted to be close and cuddle me, I'd let him, but I wouldn't risk complicating the issue by letting it become sexual. If I were him, I'd be questioning whether I should be getting married if I feel curious, or maybe I'm curious and I should just get it out of my system (!) be seeing if I like it with my gay bf. If I were you, I'd feel a bit used if he just tried it with me to satisfy his curiosity. A dilemma! I'd say, keep the closeness, cross your legs and try not to let it go further, wait and see. If he's a good friend, he'll be around in your life for a while longer. Was he planning on marrying the girl BEFORE she got pregnant or is this a shotgun wedding? He says he's not a cheater etc, but does he REALLY want to get married?
