Checking guys out?

I'm bi so my opinion may be different, but when I walk around I am always checking out women but don't check out guys. For example, I may be running around a local pond and when a woman runs by, I'm thinking "nice butt" or "cute face". When a guy runs by, I'm thinking "Wonder if those Nikes would make me run faster".

 

When you see a guy walk by and the first thing you think about is his looks, like it's automatic, then you're checking him out. If you have to stop and stare to find something to like about him, then you're forcing yourself.

 

I guess that is how it works. But I know how you feel, I rarely think about the looks of the people I'm with unless there is a reason or they are pointed out to me. I've tried looking at thier body, but I always laugh at myself because I feel like a creeper. If they were blatantly exposed sure, but it wouldnt even cross my mind in a casual setting.

 

I think it would come naturally to you, otherwise, you would be forcing it. I know that when I see a girl, I don't think about me looking at a girl, I just do it, and it's natural. If you have to kind of, analyze and think about wanting to stare or look, then, it does sound a little more forced. It doesn't really mean anything though, I mean, you said you prefer emotional to physical, so that's probably why you have to think about looking or staring, because you know that you don't have that immediate physical connection, which is why you want to analyze so you could find an emotional aspect of it.

 

I think it'll become more natural as you become more confident and sure of yourself. Right now it's an examination of yourself and whether you like men or not, rather than simply enjoying the look of him. I used to do the same thing with girls. Do I like that, do I not, am I gay if I don't like that, so on and so on. Once you figure out exactly what you like, which could be anything, it'll become second nature to seek it out, and that's where checking people out comes from. Don't worry about having to force it or not now. The natural bit comes at a later stage.

 

Uh aman is right.... well I'm bi also, but when I see a guy I automatically check out his looks, and sometimes continue to check him out. When I see a girl, usuallyl I think, hmm cute, looks like a nice person, or in other cases, "nice bod, eww face" lol :3.

 

Your supposed to be attracted to who ur attracted there's no shame in likening bigger guys I'm an athletic bigger guy I weigh (and believe I'm telling guys this lol) 245 at 6.4 in height I'm a big guy lol

 

I think checking people out is a slightly different process for everyone, as far as looking, thinking, drooling, etc.

When I first began checking attractive guys out, it felt very forced and unnatural. As time progressed, it became more natural. When I check out different types of guys I think different things, including what type of person they are emotionally. Now that I actually think about my "checking out" process, I essentially have a torrid love affair with my subject in my imagination. We meet, flirt, make discoveries about one another, and sometimes consummate the relationship. Other times I picture them doing everyday things like laundry or washing dishes. It's all based on what sort of situation I am in when I encounter them.

Based on this logic, I would wager a guess that everyone checks people out in ways unique into themselves. I also think it may get easier to deal with in time, as you experience it more frequently - as most things do.

 

When I check out a girl it comes naturally and I just do it. When I look at a guy I have to think of a reason and it's much more unnatural.

 

I used to kind of wonder if me checking out guys was the same as when I used to force myself to try and check out girls. 'Cause if I was actually forcing myself to try to check out guys, then that could be a sign of some problems.

So then one day I got the idea to google image search "hot guy" just to see if I actually found the guys to be hot (with the proper search filters on, nothing too graphic should pop up). Well, I was almost knocked to the floor by all the handsomeness. There were no longer any thoughts that it was all just in my head. Then, for thoroughness's sake, I also searched "hot girl" for comparison. The women were certainly beautiful, but they did not have anywhere near the same effect.

So yeah, while I might not make a habit of oogaling guys that walk by, noticing a guy with a hot body is not something that my brain is tricking me into doing.

 

When a hot guy walks by, my eyes just automatically clock him. I don't have to think about it whatsoever. Before I came to terms with my sexuality I probably did think about it a lot though and tried to stop myself looking, now I can't stop myself!

I always tend to try make eye contact and I'm surprised at how many guys actually maintain eye contact, even ones you'd think were straight. It's the best way to find out a persons sexuality.

 

I also have a case of not being attracted to what I'm "supposed" to. I can look at a girl with long hair and a Victoria's Secret model body and think "yeah, that's okay. She's pretty." But really what I like is butch girls who are a little chubby and don't look like the "sexy" models at all. Up until just a year ago, I'd try to check out the women that were the epitome of femme, since I guessed they were what I was expected to like by society, so I might as well try. I realized in time that that's just not my style. I'm not into that type of woman, and that's fine too. It's not like butch girls are any less female than femme ones. And I think if you look for the kind of guy you do like, instead of the kind you "should" like, you'll be much happier.

As for needing that emotional connection, that's good. That means you won't do stupid stuff just for sex, and you're making sure others can't get in your pants without you believing they love you. That's good. Also, in 4/5 relationships, love comes before sex. Don't beat yourself up over not making guys sex objects.

And I know you're gay. You just need to tell the naysayers to shush. You know you're gay too.