I currently live in a big city, it's pretty liberal and accepting most of the time. Problem is, I'm moving to the Bible Belt western Kansas. It's the same area as the Westboro Baptist Church, although I'll be a few hours away by car. The town is small, about 3,000 people, and I'll be close to two somewhat large towns (about 20,000 people in these towns). Should I stay closeted? I want to make friends and I don't want to be alienated.
I would get a feel for the town first before making a decision. I live in a small rural town in California, about 7,000 people, and it's very homophobic. I'm not saying that the town you're moving to will be homophobic but lots of small rural towns are, especially if they're in a very conservative area.
My gut reaction is to tell you to just hold your head high and walk in being who you really are from the start. There is no sense in anyone having to hide who they are. But then when I sit back and take the time to think about it, I can see why you'd be concerned. This is a decision that only you can make. Though like Cornella93 said, it might not be a bad idea to get a good feel of the location and its residents. I would have to have you showing your pride and have two anti-lgbt extremists next door trying to screw you up. Another idea. I would do some research and see if you can find any local lgbt groups or organizations. So regardless of whether you move out there being open or not, you could at least have some sort of stable support and guidance, a community where you know you'll be accepted. Whatever happens, I'm wishing you the best of luck. You'll be in my thoughts!
Tough one. If you're already out, then going closeted again might be a little rough. I have it on good authority, though, that Westboro doesn't have the best reputation even in Kansas. Nobody really likes them. Without prying into too much detail, what's bringing you to Kansas? Moving for a job with nobody you know? Moving with a partner? Family? If you're going to know someone there - or if you can figure out your company's attitude toward, and support for, lgbt employees - then it could make a difference if you know that you'll have a local support network, however small. Oh, and finally, welcome to the site!
Welcome, Shaggy :smilewave I think I'd wait and see. If you decide to be open and it mis-fires, you stand to lose a lot and you can't go back in once you're out if you find that the reception is less than favourable. Make some friends first and see how it goes with them - I think the youngsters will be much more open to difference. I know the Netherlands is not the same, but there are a lot of strict religious people here too. I was "warned" when I moved into a village of 800 people from a city (Haarlem) that I would not find people as accepting. As I moved with my partner, it was obviously not an option for us to be "not out" as we were clearly a couple. I can say that people have been very accepting - we are known as "de jongens" - the boys - and we try to be good neighbours, speaking and waving when we see people, helping if we see someone needs help - all the usual stuff. So, not only does being referred to as one of "the boys" do my ego a power of good at my age, but I feel fully accepted by my community and therefore at ease.
