Title says it all. I've been feeling really sad the last couple of days. Not entirely sure why, as nothing has happened... I've literally just been lazying around at home. Nothing bad, nothing good, pretty average. But still, I've been feeling sad. Like sad to the point I feel like crying sad. And I never cry. I haven't yet, but I've been kinda on the verge. All in all things should be pretty good right now, so I don't know why I'm bummed. So, what gives? Anyone got ideas? I'm rather confused at the moment.
What kind of stuff has been filling your head recently? A couple weeks ago I was in the same predicament. I was on the edge of crying over stuff all week and just feeling really down and not myself. It's silly, but I seen a very sad LGBT video on youtube and I think that is what triggered it for me. After that video my mind was in a more negative state regarding many things, especially my life as a gay person. Getting out of the house and doing stuff really helped it pass though.
I'm don't have any theories as to what is making you feel down, hopefully someone else will have some ideas. I felt like this last month (although I had a pretty good idea what was causing it). My best advice would be to try to get out of your house as much as possible and get involved in activities you enjoy. From experience, staying shut up at home when you're feeling down tends to make you feel worse. Sports in particular are good for lifting your mood. You said you were on the verge of crying, but have you actually cried? You might find it a bit weird, but honestly sometimes when everything builds up a good cry can actually put you in a better mood.
It's quite possible that the fact that you are just lazing about the house is causing this. Bouts of mild depression can be triggered by inactivity and isolation. My advice would be to call up a friend and do something with them.
From my experience, lazing about the house for a few days is an easy way to fall into a melancholy mood like what you've described--the French call it ennui. The thing about lazing about the house is it can make us feel unproductive, sometimes even useless, and there's no way to bullshit your way out of knowing you've been unproductive; you'll know you're lying to yourself. Is there anything that you enjoy that gets you out of your house? Something that you can do because you want to do it, and not just for the sake of getting out of the house? Because if you do it just to do something other than laze about, you'll be able to see right through that, and it probably won't work particularly well. But if you get out because you wanted to do what you went out to do, that can cure your ennui. Personally, I get that fix by going for a bike ride to a coffeehouse or some similar place where I can spend a few dollars and relax. Find what motivates you to genuinely want to go out, and it will help you.
Someone else had a similar question a few weeks (?) back, and one of the comments was along the lines of: as closeted people we train ourselves to repress display of emotion (the most obvious being not reacting at the sight of an attractive person), keep our guard up, put on the image we think is acceptable to society/family/etc... once we come out to a few or many people we reverse that trend and suddenly our emotions are no longer something that need to be hidden and stuff that's been building up for years now has a chance of escaping
Thanks everyone. Well, I already know tomorrow isn't going to be fun, but my mom did wonder if I was going back to school for a couple of days next week. Maybe I'll change my answer to a "yes" just to get out of the house for a while. Up there I can hike, rollerblade, take the bus places, take photos, etc. Come to think of it there's really nothing to do down here at home besides go on the computer, which pretty much leaves EC since my Internet is really really slow too. Even moreso, I realize I spend nearly all of my time in my room here, since our house is currently occupied with moving things in most other rooms. So it's quite likely that it's because I've been stuck at home. Didn't realize it could have such a profound effect though... And I think if I do feel sad again I probably will prompt myself to cry if nobody's around (so as to not cause concern), since that does usually make me feel better. But yeah, thanks.
