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Dropping hints

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by JakeHas, Aug 12, 2012.

  1. JakeHas

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    Hey guys and gals! I've been wanting to start dropping hints to family leading up to a conclusion of me being who I am. I don't wanna come straight out with it, but I want them to kinda work their way up into know my orientation. What's some suggestions you may have for dropping small hints to parents and other family?
    Thanks!
     
  2. TheEdend

    TheEdend Guest

    I think its hard to drop hints without outright coming out.

    Things that you can do would be sticking up for LGBT issues, comment on who is LGBT in the news or if someone comes out, and being very vague about pronouns when you talk about who you like.

    I personally think its much easier to just tell them, but whatever works for you. Good luck :slight_smile:
     
  3. Lance

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    Gender:
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    Gender Pronoun:
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    Sexual Orientation:
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    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    A few years ago I was having a really hard time getting enough courage to come out to my parents as well. So one day I went out and bought this book called "Is It A Choice" that I planned on giving to my parents since I figured it might help them out a bit after I tell them the news. Well, I didn't hide the book good enough(maybe I unconsciously wanted it to be found, lol) and it was in fact found by my mom one day. One night she came to my room and mentioned seeing it and that was the ice breaker for me.
     
  4. Jared

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    I think that bringing up LGBT issues and people who've come is a good place to start. I also started commenting on guys' clothes, hair and general appearance. Though I dropped a pretty big hint when I came out and went back in, my mom still thinks I'm straight. Denial can run pretty deep and hints tend not to snap people out of it.
     
  5. Phantosmiac

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    I find that the most unsubtle-yet-still-subtle hint is to just look at someone wierd if they mention things like "hot girls" or "crushes on girls." Granted, I can't exactly recommend this as it hasn't actually worked for me, but I was trying it on people who never really think about homosexuality hardly ever. They were extremely down to earth and would never have guessed until I told them.
     
  6. Epipleptic

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    I've found that becoming comfortable with myself has resulted in my giving clues, not hints. And these clues came out completely naturally. They weren't premeditated and I didn't even realize what I implied until after I said them. For example, an uncle who's gay told a funny story about a bar, which had to have been a gay bar, and I said, "Which bar was it? I'll have to go there." I think that caught him a little by surprise and I got a reaction out of him. Now the funny thing is I wasn't even thinking about whether is was a gay bar or not. It was just the right response given the rest of the conversation. A more closeted me would not have felt as comfortable with what I seemed to have implied.

    Other things that have happened include, checking out guys and not even pretending I'm hiding it, and giving a definite 'No' to questions about girls I like. But the important thing is: I never really planned any of it, it just happened.

    I guess what I'm trying to say is if you find yourself comfortable with yourself and feel safe expressing yourself, you may be surprised at what comes out naturally.
     
  7. JakeHas

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    Thanks everyone for all the advice, I appreciate it!