This is not exactly gay related but this is such a great forum that that I need your guys input on this problem I having at work. Ok there is this lady at work who I never had problems in the past we simply never got along but lately it just has got worse and annoying. She always seems to question my judgement and fails to see things from my perspective and rushes to judgement on everything I do. She even goes out of her way to tell me what to do and what not to do. Now I have caught her talking behind my back several times to other coworkers about my work performance and I just want to confront her about it. I understand there has been a lot of miscommunication between me and this coworker. The funny thing is it always the same coworker I have misunderstandings with. Maybe I should be better at defending myself and let her know how it is but I just not good at it so I let it go. I been working in a nursing home kitchen for a year with her and we had problems over the course of the year and they never got me in any trouble luckily. The crazy part is this women is I say around fifty years old. I am not the only person she has does this to but it seems like i am her main target. The last day I worked friday she was complaining out loud about something I did and I can't even think of anything I did wrong. How do I confront the issue face to face without causing any drama or getting authority involved? Although looking at this person's personality it will probably cause some drama.
Honestly, I don't think you can. If you confront her, even politely, about her attitude towards you, she's not going to take it well, so you either have to decide whether you want that or you want to get to the root of the issue. If you want to get to the root, the best way to do that, I'm afraid, is to go to someone who is superior to you both and ask them to hold a discussion with the both of you, to find out what the problem is. If, then, she refuses, you would know that her issues are personal, not professional, at which point you can deal with her legitimately. If it is professional, then the superior can take steps, along with yourself, to resolve the issues.
It seems like a professional issue. I don't think it would be anything personal against me. I think it has a lot to do with how she sees my work ethic. I can admit I have my imperfections but I deal with them in a positive way and I am not denying that.
The only person who should be providing you with feedback about your work is your boss. Criticism from anyone else is just noise that is best ignored. If you are concerned, you should speak to your boss in private about your performance. Ask them how THEY think you're doing. If they say fine, and ask why you're asking, then I think it would be appropriate to let them know that coworker 'X' has been very vocal in their criticism of you and you wanted to make sure that your boss was OK with your performance. More likely than not, your boss will say under their breath that 'X' is a little bit off, and that you shouldn't concern yourself with what they say.
Thanks for the feedback. We don't exactly have a official manager/boss right now but I could go to a supervisor if this gets worse.
