Guys, I just don't know how much longer I can take this.. I sit and watch one of my bestfriends getting to be happy with the girl of her dreams, while I'm miserable because I'm locked in the closet... I feel so jealous of the people with understanding parents.. My good, Christian, homophobic parents would never ever accept me. I'm so tired of having to hide it and to hide what I want. Why couldn't I have been raised in a family that accepted anybody and everybody? Sorry for the long drawn out rant, but I just want to scream it at the top of my lungs!!!!:tantrum:
i'm sorry you feel that way and if you know they won't accept you (never ever) but think of it this way: an arrow can only be shot by pulling it backward, so when life is dragging you back with difficulties, just imagine that it's going to launch you into something great
I'm not sure how my family will handle it either. My dad found gay porn on the family computer when I was 13 (I didn't delete the files?!? wth), and said to me, and I will never forget this, that "You're lucky I found it before you mother did. She would be very upset if she found it", then he walked off. That was the last dialogue I ever had with any of my family members about my sexuality. It was very damaging. I'm not sure what that experience has done to me specifically, but I know it reinforced my fear of rejection and my willingness to stay closeted.
