A week ago, I posted a thread (which is quite a long read so it died pretty quickly) about my "situation". To keep a long story short, I've been crushing on a co-worker who has grown to become a good friend of mine. I haven't seen him in 10 days, I was supposed to meet him tomorrow for the movies, but he "postponed" it again for the second time. Although, he said he would be fine next week with just the two of us. I feel as if I'm annoying him, and that he doesn't want to talk to me ever since work ended. The last day of work was just amazing, we both spent a lot of time together. He asked me to go to the mall for lunch (never did that before), and we walked around alone and talked. After work, we spent even more time (at a different, larger mall) and walked around for hours. Before we both last saw each other, he asked if I wanted to talk some more, waiting together for our buses to arrive and part ways. It ended kind of awkwardly but in a somewhat cute way, since we were both chuckling and smiling, but we left, said we'd keep in touch, etc. Later on that day, he texted me for the first time, saying he'd miss the "staff", although I was the only one he would talk to. So far, I've been trying to keep in contact with him. We'd have some decent conversations but he has never initiated any of them. I've texted him first way too much, I don't know what to do anymore. We talk a lot in real life but when we're not face to face, I have no idea how to gauge how he's feeling. I don't know if he still wants to hang out anymore, I'm confused.
I would love to help you but I have the same problem that you have. My "best friend" that i have a crush on never replies to my messages and never send the first one now that we are on vacations, but when we are together face to face we talk a lot and we have kind of a connection if you know what I mean. But the question is does he knows that you are gay?
I wouldn't put all your "emotional eggs" into this particular basket, no. Feel free to keep communications open and engaged, but I'd look elsewhere for people to hang out with (and possibly date). Lex
Hard to tell. Some people are just passive with communications and don't initiate, but are happy to talk. Or he could be phenomenally busy if he has a new job. Or he could be somewhere between denial and accepting that he's gay and not ready to acknowledge what you two might be feeling for each other. Or he could be straight. I realize this isn't terribly helpful, but one of the things my therapist said to me many years ago in therapy that I've never forgotten is, "Some things simply don't have neat endings in life, and we have to get used to that." So perhaps you should just let it sit for a month and see where it leads... text him once or twice at the end of that period and see if he shows interest. If so, maybe something comes of it. If not, move on. I realize that probably isn't what you want to hear but I don't know there's much else you can do.
No, and I don't know if he is gay either. He's been giving me mixed signals about it though. We've both joked about "coming out of the closet" and "texting each other at night when we're horny", but I still haven't had the courage to just ask him straight up. Pun not intended.
