I think I just need a sounding board. And some feed back. Just someone to talk to!! I'm in my early 30's and have been attracted to women for longer than I'm willing to admit. Probably even longer than that, but...hey. I remember in high school thinking that I was looking at guys wrong because I didn't find them attractive. For me....I'm just not physically/sexually attracted to men. I can agree that they are cute, that they are good looking, that they are handsome. But a six-pack does nothing for me. It's nice to look at but...meh. Give me curves and hips and breasts any day. But I like being around guys. Most of my friends are male. I find (some) women to be very immature and katty. I've lucked out and have 3 wonderfully intelligent male friends (not to say that women aren't intelligent--we are!). We have wonderful conversations and enjoy the same activities and spending time together, even if it's just to play video games. I just don't seem to have that type of connection with women. Does any of this make sense?
Oh it makes sense to me. Are you saying that you want a woman to hang out with you like how your guy friends do?
It's not unusual for lesbians to connect more, on a friendship level, with men. It's a platonic friendship kind of relationship, though. Is that what you mean? Many gay men also find that they are more often friends with women. This was never true for me--most of my friends are girls. But I'm a girly girl, and most of the lesbians that relate more to men in this way are... not girly girls. Actually, I relate to you completely on one thing--"meh" is pretty much exactly how I feel about men. When the girls went all boy crazy, I felt really alienated from them in some ways because of it, although I didn't understand at the time that I was gay. And since I didn't relate to the boys either, sometimes I was really kind of isolated. I think everything you said absolutely makes sense. You can send me a PM, since I'm on staff, if you want to talk.
I think that maybe you owe it to yourself this time around to act on your feelings since you're still questioning them. I'm the same way with guys, it's fun hanging out as friends, but I prefer a woman in my bed. Are you out at all? Would you be open to dating a woman romantically? I have a few female friends; I'm not dramatic, but I think the women I come across daily get the wrong impression of me. I think it's because I'm usually attracted to some, and I don't know how to act :lol: Give the next attractive girl you see a compliment and see how it makes you feel. Then go from there, perhaps you'll discover who you truly are.
Nocturnal--I'm just thinking...if I can't form/keep a friendship with a woman, how will I ever be in a relationship with one. Pinklov3ly-- You said "I think that maybe you owe it to yourself this time around to act on your feelings since you're still questioning them." Act on what feelings? With whom? I have no romantic feelings towards any of my male friends. Kinda tried that with a couple of them. Didn't work. Haha I think women get the wrong impression of me too--that I'm going to steal their husbands/boyfriends! Ianthe--I'm not a girly girl. I'm not a tomboy. I guess I'm somewhere in the middle. I'm just as happy in a skirt as sweats. I like to paint and build stuff and play video games, but I'm just as content going to the ballet or a musical (I know--these are all stereotypical examples, but you get my point. I hope.). I'll probably send you a PM sometime over the weekend. Thanks
Ha! As a gay man I can totally flip what you said! I can tell when a woman is beautiful or "hot" but I'm still not interested in them. Boobs and hips and curves are nice to look at, but they do nothing for me. Give me abs and pecs and biceps any day! Anyway, it's funny how are brains are wired completely opposite isn't it? I find that many men tend to be boorish and immature so I don't have too many male friends. Most guys I know only like to talk about sports, video games, and of course, hot girls. I know girls can be catty and immature too, but I find that women tend to be more deep and open about their emotions than men, and I can relate to women in that way (although I'm not really effeminate). It all depends on who we hang out with really. I have a feeling the hot blonde girls you're attracted to are the ones who are catty and immature, just as the guys I'm attracted to are all boorish meatheads. I agree with Ianthe in that since our brains are to a degree wired similarly to the brains of the opposite gender, we can connect with them better on an emotional and platonic level. Although I can't relate to lesbians all that much, we're all in the same boat in that we are different from most people of our gender and have to come to terms with who we are. I say search out a beautiful intelligent lesbian woman who suits you and see where the relationship goes! You say you can't find one but I know you're just looking in the wrong place. Good luck!
Haha the only beautiful intelligent lesbian I know is happily married to another equally intelligent lesbian. I know--I need to get out more. :rolle:
