I know there’s no requirement of anyone to have a specific label put on themselves. “I’m a boy, I’m a girl, I’m straight, I’m bisexual, I’m whatever comes to mind…” But in the past while, I’ve come to sort of… want something to call myself. I’m biologically female, but recently I’ve started feeling more and more less like a ‘girl.’ I have a condition called Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, which in my case, means more body hair, no menstruation, and a hormone imbalance. That’s not the only reason I feel the way I do, but I’m sure it plays some part. I stopped feeling like a ‘girl’ when I was in high school, and I slowly began to work my way into being more or less gender fluid. I got mistaken for male on several occasions, but it never really bothered me. I don’t exactly want to be male, specifically, I just don’t feel like I’m female. I guess what I’m really trying to get at is that ‘genderqueer’ isn’t really… the label I’m looking for, for myself. I’ve done research and tried different ideas, picked them apart and wondered what they meant to me. I read Kate Bornstein’s ‘My Gender Workbook,’ (which is awesome and I think everyone should at least consider reading it) but then I just ended up questioning myself even more, and changing the answers to the questions I already had, which made them change into something else entirely… And I’m still at a loss. I want something solid, something someone can understand without an explanation. I know that’s asking a bit more than some of society feels is appropriate, but… I don’t know. TL;DR: OP is confused and actually wants a label, but doesn’t know if any fit her anyway.
your label is your name. there you go. sorted. thats my label if anyone asks anyway. besides that lol, no one can really help you label yourself. you could be genderless. im not sure what they folk are called though.... sorry if i offended anyone. but really if you havent i would suggest talking it through with a professional
You may be asexual. Although that is more into sexual orientation rather than gender identity, from your post, it seems that it is the best fit for you right now, as you seems to be not a male, female, nor genderfluid. Here is a question to ask yourself: If you were to be in a world where there is no clear gender, and every living being there is androgynous in every possible ways, and you can also choose to be whatever gender you want - as a male, or female, or both, or sexless, inside and outside, what would you be? Would it even matter to you?
I remember I struggled with gender identity for ages when I was younger. Eventually I trashed all the new labels and went with "female," with the qualifier "not very feminine" if necessary. Personalities can make gender identity very confusing when masculine and feminine traits come into play.
Thanks for the ideas. There are still a lot of questions I think I may need to answer, but just sort of spilling everything onto a page helps and I appreciate the responses. ^^
I don't know much about the gender topic, but my first thought while reading your post is do some people take medication to get to an average female (or male) hormone level? Are there effective treatments for Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome? Is that something that would help you feel more female since it sounds like you're fine with being female? I don't mean any disrespect to you just as you are and I don't think people should seek medical intervention unless needed. I'm just thinking of medical issues in general and if there is an effective treatment, people typically get it if they can. Sorry, this is off topic, but I'm trying to understand more about gender identity and I was very interested in your story. Take care!
