I've had an eating disorder for going on seven years and am only now getting over it completely, not just as a "good period" before a relapse. Things are going pretty well now, but I've been thinking of it in relation to my sexual orientation and the way it's changed things for me. When I was really deep in the illness somewhat under one year ago, I had a very low body weight, no menstruation, was severely depressed, etc.... and I had ZERO sexual attraction to anyone. I never even thought about sex or sexuality, not at all. I was a completely un-sexual being, and I was stuck there. Before that, I had always thought I was something other than straight and assumed I was probably bisexual, but tried to put it out of mind due to backlash from my mom, who was very skeptical and unhappy when I once brought it up to her. Nowadays, the anorexia is gone (still present in my mind, but physically gone) and I am very healthy. I'm even improving in terms of depression. And now that I'm healthy, the issue of my sexuality seems so much clearer to me than it ever did before. I know for sure that I'm bisexual; I'm attracted to men and women and the fact that I ever tried to deny it seems so strange to me. It was so obvious! I've been wondering why the end of my eating disorder seemed to trigger this larger awareness and certainty of my sexuality. The trauma, maybe? Can anyone relate, or offer any thoughts on why things are this way for me?
Yes I had an eating disorder throughout high school and had zero sexual attractions to men or women, no fantasies etc. I think it may be simply a case of your hormones being shut down when you are that unhealthy. From what I remember, no menstruation means you are not producing much estrogen, which is a sex hormone, so it would make sense that you had no sex drive before. Maybe now you are healthier, your hormones are regenerating and so you are becoming more aware of your desires.
