So in my quest to date (or whatever you want to call it, it's too late to get poetic :lol I've noticed that many out guys at school have barriers up, be it swearing off dating or a facade of douchiness, to prevent guys from getting too close in a romantic way. But now that I no longer, I hope, am looking for someone, I've noticed this extends to general socializing. I had plans with a couple of guys to hang out, and plans with another for a date...thingy. Well the date went smoothly (we're now on date 2.5...long story :lol but the two hangouts never happened. Why? Because they both were busy. But here's the thing; when I run into them they say "we should hang out soon" but then they don't follow through. Am I missing something here? Because it feels like they (and they're both gay) are preventing themselves from getting close to ANY gay guy, or maybe just me I've had a couple friendships kind of flake off due to external drama, and I'm not really looking for more friends - I'm introverted and am happy with the friends I have.
From my experience, "we should hang out soon" rarely means that we should really hang out. Its usually more of a polite way to finish a conversation and feeling like you are being nice. Its weird, but that's usually how its used. If someone truly wants to hang out, then they will already have something in mind, they will tell you when they are available and they will put effort into it. Don't take it personally, though. Its just one of those things in our society. Sort of how "hello, how are you?" isn't really someone asking to see how your life is going. He is just trying to say hello and a simple "fine, thank you" is always enough haha I have personally done it without thinking. I will sometimes say it to people as a polite way to end a conversation xD
I love your icon! This is basically just agreeing with The Edend, but it's often used by people who no longer see each other very often (as well as in your situation) as a "i still like you but i don't feel the need to meet up with you, but i want you to know that i still like you so i'm giving you these nice yet ultimately empty words". So it's probably something similar. They like you as a friend, but have no interest in dating you at the moment. It just leaves you open to find someone better!
Oh, it wasn't asking them out, but asking to hang out on a 'just friends' basis. And we did have something in mind, like a movie or similar things, but they always flaked. Ah well, their loss
