I'm stuck is describes me the best.. My dad doesnt approve of me being gay. He said he wont ever believe in my "choice" of lifestyle. Its hard because I cant loose my dad hes all I have. My mother hasnt been involved in my life since I was 4. I fell in love with a girl for the first time 2 years ago, but we did break up things didnt work out which iS okay, but what suck is that we have the SAME exact friends i cant get away from her. it is now impossible for me to bring around a new girl in front of them.. they wouldnt like it. so i feel very limited on what I can do in my hometown. I feel trapped in a sense where i cant be myself to the fullest.. i feel like i dont have anyone anymore. no one to turn to. o r to talk to.. not even my dad. and what caugght me of guard After me and my ex broke up I honeslty thought I wouldnt fall for another girl (which made me happy because then my father would be happy)... But then I met this AMAZING girl... shes absolultey everything I want and need in a partner. i fell so deeply in love with her. it blows my mind. but she lives in another state, I just spent this weekend with her.. she asked me to move out there with her.. at first I was scared of leaving my hometown cuz my whole life has been here. work family school etc.. but when I went this weekend, I was finally happy with myself. ive been very disconnected and depressed, but seeing her changed me.. i guess what advice im asking for is that.. Do I stay here to in my hometown to resolve my issues? or do I move out there with her where I know I can guarantee my happiness? and how do i accept the fact that my farther wont ever love me to his full capacity? i just feel so stuck about my life :icon_sad:
Welcome to Empty Closets. I am very sorry that you had a negative coming out experience. It is possible that your father may improve over time. It is rather rare for someone to express a generalized hatred and then fail to change upon learning a loved one belongs to that group. If your dad is truly rare (although not gifted) in that way, you will have to find other support. I think you need to do whatever you can to make yourself feel more secure. If you feel like you can't resolve your issues in your hometown, by all means move.
I think you should stay for a little while in your hometown and see if it gets better there. Time is a major factor and that might be just what your father needs. If it doesn't work out, then follow your heart. If she is as amazing as you say she is and your happy being with her then go for it.
Personally I would go for it. Even if it doesn't work out, what have you got to lose? Every time you go somewhere new, you learn more about yourself. Give your dad some time to figure things out. Not having you around might just show him how much he cares about you (and if it doesn't, there probably wasn't much hope to begin with). Your hometown will always be where you left it, unless there's something about continental drift I missed in high school. To be fair, I may not have been paying attention.
