I've been dating this girl for a year now and we are truly in love. Both of our parents are catholics but her parents, especially her dad, are very very strict catholics. If she misses church on any holy day she gets in huge trouble. Her dad even threatened to kick her out for missing church on sunday to many times. Neither of our parents know we are together and we don't plan on telling them any time soon, but she is very worried about it. Her mom just posted something on fb that says "real marriage is between a man and a woman." She feels like her dad would disown her and kick her out, and her mom wouldn't wanna talk to her anymore. And most important to her, her sister would also be like that. (or so she thinks). I'm not sure how to comfort her. One thing is for sure, we both know that no matter what even if both our parents decide they hate us we are not leaving eachother. We may have only been together a year but I can tell you I wont ever leave her. Any of you have strict catholic parents? How did ur parents take it? How can I comfort her and convince her it will be ok?
Nobody else has posted anything, but I'm not really sure what to say. The idea that someone could be kicked out for missing church just seems so unbelievable. Talk about conditional love.
Thanks. Anybody else have some advice? I desperate here. She couldn't sleep last night, and she called me this morning crying because of this. I feel like there is no hope for her family to accept us. And she has told me a million times that she would pick me over her family. I feel like I'm gonna cause her to lose her family.
No please don't think that. I have a similar experience with me and my girlfriend. I came out to my openly homophobic dad not long ago, and although he clearly doesn't agree with it, and he thinks that I'm just going through some kind of phase, he was accepting! He never treats our relationship differently, and though it's obvious he holds his tongue around her, he does it because he respects my informed choices as an adult, and I would hope your parents would do the same. As for the Catholic side- my girlfriend is a strict Hindu, and has not come out to her parents for fear of being a 'shame on the family' and being disowned by them. I think it's an awful position to be in, but I know that one day she will have to deal with it, and I will be there 100% to help and support her. I've never asked her to come out to them, and she knows I never would, and I know that once she does I'll be the enemy who changed their daughter into a lesbian. But truth is, we've been together a year and she's been in relationships with girls for almost 17 years- so totally her choice! When push comes to shove though, I know her parents are just looking out for their daughter because they care, and we have that in common, we all care for her. If they take it badly, then they don't have to see me, they can carry on without me there to remind them, and they can pretend we're not together if that makes them happy. But I'm sure they'd want to see her, and she'd want to see them, so all I can do is be her support! I hope you get some resolution in this, losing sleep over it when you have no intention of raising the issue with them yet is not going to help you both though xx
