So right off the bat i know i never respond to the answers to my questions, this is usually because i either figured out myself or it no longer mattered. I do read the answers tho so i'm still grateful to responses and would like them just ... letting you know my side. So anyway ... me and a few friends of mine just about had group sex. Like we where just talking and stuff in my friend W (girl) house with my friend A (guy) and T (girl). After a while W and T just started making out (both bi, but not dating) and after a while we where all in on it. It was stopped when T had to go. I didn't like the girls for their bodies tho i just like you know ... kissing them and along those lines (kissing different genders with me it feels the same). They all know i'm gay and not interested in girls but they didn't really care. I was horny lol and even afterwords i was thinking about the feeling rather than the actual people. So long story short W and i agreed to have sex tomorrow. I'm a virgin and she's not, she kinda has had the hots for me and just wants to do it. She sorta has been around the block (not a slut but just ... likes sex lol. no diseases or anything) My problem is like ... am i bi now? haha like i KNOW i will like the sex but i don't really find her sexually attractive at all (she is really beautiful but you know what i mean). I figured i should just try it at least once, but i keep worrying like what if i'm not gay? what a waste of like 2 years! Like i said i don't LIKE her, she knows it i know it there aren't like mixed signals there. And also like SHOULD i do it? experimentation is good right, like shouldn't i try to have sex with a girl? Like i said she is available, wants me and i want to have sex and experiment so is that good? ANY suggestions appreciated but please no judgement this is a one time thing i NEVER act like this (you know, thinking with my %*&#) I like strong relationships and long-term, i'm not like a slut or anything. And lastly i'll TRY to respond this time :icon_bigg what a $*(%ed up day, amiright?
No, it doesn't sounds like it, you're gay. Remember, there are straight guys who have sex with men sometimes, and there are gay folks who can enjoy their occasional heterosexual fling. If you feel like this is something that both of you want and it has the potential to be a positive experience, go for it. I mean hell, I was watching a YouTube video about Dan Savage talking about how he would totally have sex with a particular androgynous lesbian firefighter in Seattle. And even though I know he's gay (as in, community leader of gayness), I totally believe it. Basically, I think that you should do it as long as both of you still feel positive about it when it's actually time. And if while you're having sex you don't like it like you thought you would, you can just stop. Consent is a two-way street.
No, you're not bisexual now. You are still gay. What makes you want to have sex with her anyway? It seems like nothing but negative for you. All it sounds like is you want the "experience" of it, but is it worth doing it with some "slutty" girl you have no attraction to?
to Pret Allez- thanks i appreciate that, it really does make me feel more comfortable with myself. And i'll keep in mind i can always back out of it. to Lance- no haha it's not negative! I WANT to have sex, really do and so does she. This isn't just a "i wanna get it over with" thing. People always say it's good to experiment when ur young, and i never do anything. We talked about it and she said it's okay if i don't want to but she's there if i change my mind. She knows why i want it and is okay with it. Also like i said she isn't a slut she just has experience, lot's of girls do. It's funny though girls like me ALL THE TIME, guys almost never. Disappointing.
Well, how visibly gay are you? If you're straight-acting*, it might be that a lot of guys just passed you up because they didn't read anything on you. *I hate that term for reasons I won't derail the thread with by explaining.
well i dress pretty nice, skinny jeans, almost always a button-up long sleeve, some bracelets and the like. Also i just recently got my ears pierced which i am told makes me look gayer. The problem is i i'm 6ft and have a pretty deep voice and i look 'manly' (though i'm not, actually about 50/50 on the whole fem/masculine thing). The thing is, EVERYONE knows i'm gay. i'm completely open about and am even in the schools gsa. The only guy to like me besides my ex-bf is nice, but is really weird, and ... not very attractive. And yeah i as well hate the term straight acting, it's like if you're not in the closet you're not acting straight, because if you're gay you will be acting how you are, not how people think you are. And if you're gay and being who you are, no matter what shouldn't THAT be acting gay?
Just make sure you use protection. Like, new condoms and such. Unless you're going to both get an STD test, of course, which doesn't seem likely... And unless you want an oops baby. Honestly, you can be gay without being "perfectly gay". Some people identify as gay but occasionally have sex (and enjoy it!) with women. They still identify as gay. *shrugs* Not my place to tell them differently.
