Okay, just to warn you, yes this will be another typical "I like this guy, is he straight, isn't he?" thread, but I'm not asking for your opinion on his sexuality, as only I can really find that out. But yeah, it's the start of a new school year, and there are many new kids at school. One guy, who we'll call Jimmy (wouldn't feel right to post his name without his knowing) has become a particularly good friend of mine, as we're always spending time together in lesson or during lunches, when we're allowed out of the school grounds. As many if not all of you know, we're privileged to have a gaydar, which is normally pretty accurate when you're not wearing rose-tinted glasses.. I've been getting some fairly gay signals coming from him, but seeing as he's never said he is gay/bi/whatever, and has a girlfriend, I am a bit confused. What I'm asking from you guys, is what should my best approach be? He's extremely flirty, overly flirty if he is indeed straight, but I understand that being flirty towards guys doesn't always make you gay by default. However, the compliments and the suggestive conversations do make me think he is.. Please get back to me!
If he has a girlfriend then you have to assume he's straight really. The only way you could possibly make him 'come out' (if he is) is outing yourself to him, I'd say. *shrugs*
I am going through a somewhat similar experience. I just came out to him the other day after he asked if I had a girlfriend but I did not push the subject. He was rather cool about it, in fact he seemed even more comfortable. I am almost certain he is gay, not because he is overly effeminate it's just a gut feeling, now the ball is on his court and I am waiting to see what happens. I guess if you are not willing to let him know you are bi and interested you should just flirt right back and see where this takes you. I completely agree with you when it comes to gaydar, it's not infallible and in my experience it has more to do with a feeling rather than random assumptions about someone based on stereotypes, so definitely trust your instinct. Good luck!
"Wow, Jimmy, if it wasn't for your girlfriend, I'd say you were flirting with me. Not that I mind - it's kind of fun, actually." Lex
