So just curious. As with anything in life peoples opinions are like a mixed bag of bolts. Why do you think that to some cisgender gays, genitalia is so important? It's stereotyped that men are often preoccupied with sex, so in cases where that's apparent it could very possibly be the cause. I read a quote how someone didn't know if they could because, he claimed, "vaginas scare me" Vaginas scare me too, bro. I wish I didn't possess one XD Anywho discuss
Regardless of gender or orientation, I think very few people can honestly say that physical attraction doesn't play a factor in whether they decide to pursue a relationship with a person. For some, there's no doubt it plays a bigger part than others, and for those who see it as a smaller issue, I believe they can "overlook" things if their feelings for the person are strong. However, what it really comes down to is, if the person can't become aroused by their partner's body (and for some, this might be more mental than physical so it might not present a problem), the relationship probably isn't going to work out. Just as we can't help being born in the wrong bodies, they can't help that they're not attracted to them. When I was younger, I used to have trouble accepting that many gay guys wouldn't be attracted to me on the basis of me having a vagina, and I took it really personally, but I've learned that you can't fault someone for their preferences. If a guy outright told me "vaginas scare me," I would think he was a bit of a prick though. There's a polite way of rejecting someone who you don't find attractive, and that's not it. I see it as equivalent to saying "No blacks" or "No femmes" on a dating profile; if a person like that contacts you, and they truly aren't your type, just say "No thanks" and move on.
My post may or may not be inappropriately blunt. Spoiler Penises are important because they're ultimately what I'd like to see during sex. Of course, penises themselves aren't very nice - they look gross and I usually think of them as dirty. You can show me all the penises you want in any size, shape, or form and I won't be attracted to it. But once I get down to sexy time, the... reaction they give off is ultimately what I'm attracted to. What they can do. That's attractive. I could be with a guy who has the hottest body I've ever seen in the world, but if he has a vagina then I can't have sex with him. I'm just not attracted to vaginas, no matter who they're attached to. Like electrolicious said, saying "vaginas scare me" isn't really appropriate, and that's certainly not why I don't like vaginas. Actually I quite like vaginas in a non-sexual way. I think they're interesting. So. There's more to it then the upper body, y'know?
This is exactly what I was gonna say o.o. Its not that they 'care more' is that they have a singular attraction. Just like, its not like bisexual or pansexual people 'care less' or 'dont care', they just have a wider range of possible attraction. It 'matters' to everyone, its just about whether someone is attracted to a smaller or larger range of individuals. Personally, I feel that the people that shout from the hill tops about how much it 'doesnt matter' to them, and they 'love personality, not appearance', just want to feel special, blatantly put :/.
When I identify as "gay," it doesn't mean I'm attracted to men, it means I'm attracted to male-bodied people. There are gay guys who are attracted to some more nebulous quality of masuclinity, but I'm not one of them.
