Hi! I am new to this thing. I am gay, but not out entirely. I just don't see the point. If you were to know me, I would probably seem like a likeable guy. I am not too feminine, but I am more so androgynous. I just don't try to belong to the stereotypes of beig gay, yet I don't want to seem like a manly man. I am me. Anyway, more specifically, I am a highschool senior, and I am tired of being alone. I know you shouldn't want a realtionship to be happy, but I just see all these other happy couples. All these couples who seem made for each other. So, there's this boy. I liked him before I even really knew him. Not only because of his looks, but because of his mannerisms, personality, etc. I kind of let this crush linger. I let it linger to the point where I could think about was him. It has been two years now. In the mean time I have become pretty good friends with him. The cool thing about it is that he reached out and became friends with me. I didn't do anything. The thing is I really like him still. I've dropped hints. I smile all the time and he even smiles back. Heck, I buy him things. Just like t-shirts and stuff. But anyway, I keep getting the feeling he is either gay or bisexual. He kind of fits the stereotype and I know that's horrible to say, but it's true. He does musical theatre, is fashionable, and is in the choir. He also kind of has a lisp, but its weird because it comes and goes. He doesn't know I'm gay and some awkward things keep being brought up. Like the other day. The other day, I was at a friends house and him and another friend were lying down on a couch. I am not even kidding when I say he pulled me on top of him. He told me to lie down with them and me being awkward was trying to distance myself away from my crush. Then he grabbed my hand and pulled me over him. We just stayed there for a while. Even if he is gay, I would still say that's a bit weird for anyone to do. Then, another day we were in class. We were in class and I kid you not, he took my other friend's ring and asked me to "marry" him. I said alright sarcastically. In reality I was dying, but hey, life's an act. Then he proceeded right away to deny being gay so marriage wouldn't work out. I think he sensed my awkwardness which made him retract away. It was odd. There are many more things that have happened, these are just the one's from the past two weeks. I can't tell if he's just being playful, if he likes me, or if he's just naturally flirty. I can't interpret anything anymore. It has gotten to the point where I should just ask, but I don't know how. I don't know how to go about doing anything. I was just hoping you could guide me in some direction. I am tired of guessing, but I don't want to open up and hypothetically shoot myself in the foot.
I don't see the problem, you like him, he likes you. He very well could be straight but you never know what could happen if you asked him he was gay or you come out to him. It could all just be a bromance, the possibilities are endless. But if you do want to know just ask or tell him it is the most simplest and straight forward way if you want a relationship with him. What's life without a bit of risk..? Pretty boring if you ask me. BTW since he initiated friendship first I think its only fair that you try and develop your relationship. Best of luck.
I think you should ask him. Ask him in private and maybe while you are asking look at his reaction. The things he does seems like he sort of likes you so I would ask, as fr how to ask that's up to you, maybe of I were asking I would ask like "I'm not trying to make you uncomfortable but are you gay or bi?" and wait for his reaction if it is immediately "NO" then ask again like "it's ok if you are" and thm maybe you could tell him you are gay..... I don't know if my advice is good for you but I'm trying to pop out ideas I've never come out to guys before I've only come out to one of my friends who is a girl and someone I trust alot. But I hope my ideas have helped a bit or given you and idea
I find that in awkward situations, you sometimes have to treat them like a cold swimming pool. Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and dive right in. Nothing fancy, nothing to be misconstrued. Just a good ol' fashioned leap of faith. It might feel a bit weird and a bit stupid, but you'll adjust. Just go for it.
Would you be comfortable coming out to him? If you are, then go for it. He might, in turn, take your trust and use it as an opportunity to trust you, and come out, if he is indeed gay. If you're intending to ask him, do so cautiously; it might push him away and he might take it like you're trying to pry. On the other hand, if you aren't comfortable with coming out to him, then just wait. Good things do sometimes come to those who wait.
I think I'm going to try whenever we are alone again. I just can't stand all of these little games anymore. I do enjoy him being flirty, but it's annoying if they do not mean anything. I think I'll just bring up bisexuality and how I think everyone is a bit of both to some extent. Maybe it will be less awkward that way. I don't know. I just want to move forward with this or plainly move on. Thanks for your advice. If you guys still have any advice or relatable situations, I'd love to hear.
