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I love my friend but I dont know if he's gay/bi

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by MagicMadman, Oct 6, 2012.

  1. MagicMadman

    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    Gender:
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    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    Hello. Im MagicMadman I live in the UK. In school theres this kid in my class. Who I really fancy. He acts a bit feminine and hasn't had a girlfriend. I dont know what to do. Can you help?


    Thanks


    MagicMadman

    P.S


    I have a good friendship with him and dont want to lose that. If i did id be really :***: upset!
     
  2. BudderMC

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    Well, usually I give the whole "is ruining your friendship worth a shot at this" speech, but you already have that decided.

    Onto more important questions:

    1) Do you know if he likes guys?
    2) Does he know you like guys?
    3) How old are you both?

    Though ultimately, if you don't want to blow the friendship you're probably better off just vowing to get over your feelings for him rather than trying to act on them. That decision is up to you though. If you do want to try and get over him, the trinity for getting over crushes is time, distance, and distraction. I don't know your situation so I don't know which of those 3 will help, but that's usually what does.
     
  3. MagicMadman

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    thanks. ill think about it.
     
  4. Lexington

    Full Member

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    Two ways to proceed.

    1. Tell him you're bisexual. Tell him you've been finding guys attractive in addition to girls. Let him know you're telling him this because you're friends, and you think you can trust him with this information. He may respond by comingout to toy. Or maybe not at first. Or maybe not at all. But he now as an open if he chooses to take it.

    2. Actions not words. Don't bring up the G word or B word. Just get him alone, and start putting the moves on him. This is more likely to get something happening quicker, but also far more likely to end the friendship (even if you end up getting physical with him).

    I tend to advise 1...but it's surprising hw many people choose 2. :slight_smile:

    Lex