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Nightly depression patterns?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by BudderMC, Oct 10, 2012.

  1. BudderMC

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    Hey guys.

    I've been noticing this for a while now but never really thought much of it... I'm not sure what's triggering me to think it's significant tonight, but whatever. I feel like on a nightly basis (like as it gets into evening/nighttime) I start to feel down/depressed/in a funk. There's no particular thing I'm depressed about, usually whatever's pertinent to the time being, but it seems to be a very consistent thing that by the time evening rolls around I start feeling that way again.

    I used to blame it on "letting" myself be depressed during the night because of pathetic fallacy or something (thin justification, I know), but I don't even buy into that now.

    What gives? And how can I break this cycle if I can't tell what's bothering me?
     
  2. Dodonnas

    Dodonnas Guest

    I seem to be suffering from the same problem. Had I to make an educated guess as to the source of my issues, I'd say insomnia from nightmares, or, the fact that I spend the day being very social in my job and personal life and then I go home and am alone as everyone I know is falling asleep.

    Anymore, I hate the day more as it drags on. I don't know if this helps but could you be in either or both of the situations I am in?
     
  3. Owen

    In Loving Memory Full Member

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    I get that kind of temporal depression, too. It comes and goes for me, sometimes showing up nightly for a couple of days, then disappearing for a while. I've often found that the things that occupy my thoughts at night are the things that I haven't let myself think about during the day, due to either being too busy or too distracted by other things to think about them. But when night comes and I can just be with my thoughts, the things that I've been putting off thinking about finally come through.

    I've often found that writing can help when I get in a bad mood. Perhaps when you're feeling the way you're describing, you can try writing down what you're thinking (a Microsoft Word or TextEdit document can work if regular journaling in a paper journal isn't your thing). Half the time when I do this, it alone provides relief. By forcing myself to put my problems into words, I realize that my problems are more manageable than they seem when I let them exist in abstract in my head. And when the writing alone doesn't help, I can look at what I wrote down the next morning, when I'm in a better mood, and try to address whatever was causing me worry the night before.

    If the causes of this temporal depression aren't simple life stressors, you'll probably need to do something more than just the method above, but it has often worked for me, so it's worth a shot.
     
  4. Bree

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    This may seem odd, but have either of you tried going to bed earlier?
    I find that the longer I stay up, the more awful I feel- but simultaneously, the harder it seems to be to get to bed at all. It also comes around in a cycle- I feel worse the next night, and therefore have an even harder time getting to bed. When I'm in the habit of going to bed earlier (say, by ten or ten-thirty) I feel a lot better all around.

    Which is somewhat ridiculous for me to be saying considering that it's after ten, I'm still 493 words short of my daily quota, and I'm procrastinating on EC. I need to get off the internet and get back to writing my book. Maybe I can get to sleep before 11:30. Better than the 1:00 last night.
     
  5. solost44

    solost44 Guest

    I swear its like some of you we're reading my mind as i was logging in to i guess vent about how crappy im feeling. I to have found myself in a bad funk today as well. It actually began last evening and caused me to miss work today. I've tried journaling and other things but nothing really seems to help. Why does depression have to exist? It really sucks!!!
     
  6. CTJ

    CTJ
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    It could be a similar effect as S.A.D (seasonally affective disorder), people tend to suffer with depression more as the seasons change. I think (its been a while since i studied it lol) that its based around how much sunlight we're exposed to and since most of us work indoors in the winter, we see virtually none of it and we end up going into a winter depression. You feeling depressed at night could be a similar effect maybe?

    I know for me i tend to get miserable just as im going to bed because i have nothing to distract me from my own thoughts, lying there in bed i start to think about how crap my life is, how i need to stop being a coward and come out, how i might never find someone, how i hate my job, how i wish i'd done things differently, etc, etc. I firmly believe these thoughts and the misery are the cause of my insomnia.
     
  7. Night Rain

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    Mine happens when there is a full moon. :lol:
     
  8. BudderMC

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    Thanks everyone. Just to clarify, I'm not actually having troubles sleeping or anything, but it's just clockwork for me to feel depressed about things by around 6-8pm, depending on the day. It doesn't matter much whether I'm alone and relaxing, or doing work, or hanging with other people, I still feel it. Though when I'm with other people, I try more actively to hide it.

    This is true for me, to an extent. The longer I'm up the worse I feel. This is kind of why I made this thread though; last night I had to stay up late to do work (~1:30ish) and while I was okay with that prospect, I was feeling miserable the whole time. I usually prefer to get my work done during the day, but some days I have no choice but to do it in the evening, and I know myself well enough that I work really inefficiently when I'm in a funk.
     
  9. burg

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    i think it pretty natural 2 get down at night.i have a trick for you download some audio books and play them when you go to bed i promise it works.ive been playing podcasts from the history of rome.and critical thinking podcasts.going over life problems is healthy as long as there is a solution to why you are feeling down.if you are dwelling on past unfixable events then look for ways to think of something else.
     
  10. BudderMC

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    So I gave this a shot, trying to really figure out what I was bothered about. I didn't write it down or anything, but I did give it some serious thinking, rather than non-committal "I feel depressed" feelings floating around my head. Listening to music helped a fair bit too.

    Seems I was having a couple days of "I'm really not liking being gay" mixed with a bit of "I'm feeling really lonely". But I think I'm better now, or at least tonight, so I'll enjoy it while it lasts.

    But thanks again everyone for the suggestions. Much appreciated. :slight_smile:
     
  11. Yeah, I have the same problems.

    Is it just me or does it usually happen when we're really tired? My only advice is, once you hit this point, it's usually time to go to sleep.
     
  12. AAASAS

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    Maybe you just aren't getting enough exercise. I usually feel depressed at the end of a long day of doing nothing.
     
  13. Pat

    Pat
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    I think intently at night. If you're questioning your being, then I would say that's one of the more unique but dangerous conversations to have with yourself. I do have times where I can't put into words what I'm feeling. That's my anxiety when my emotions mix.. try to identify what it is that's making you less than chipper and nail it down.