before anyone even thinks of scrolling past this guy is GAY I know he is, he told me, and we met on one of those apps. anyway, its been a few months of messaging and texting back and forth, we havent gone a week without talking and when we do talk its goes on for days, i like him a lot and i think he likes me too (calls me sweet heart and other gushy stuff, i do it back too, and we are constantly flirting/ complimenting each other) and over time ive been making really vague references and he gets them and among a bunch of other similarities. today i found out he draws and now i cant take it anymore i want to tell him i like him and want to commence dating protocols immeidately but there is an issue school our colleges are roughly a 4 hour drive away from each other, but when we are at our parents houses its only 28 miles which idk how long that it time wise. i told myself i would never do long distance but i am seriously considering it especially if we can hang out whenever we are nearby. i dont know i need someones opinion thats not directly involved because i am far beyond emotionally compromised, though i dont know who exactly since my threads get brushed off quite easily. and yes we met on one of those apps but both are profiles are on a friends first basis and if anything develops then so be it kind of thing, theres another question pertaining to that slightly related to this and if it comes up ill ask it but for now, not yet. just know that both of us have never been with a guy and the furthest we ever got to that sort of thing was jokingly saying howd we date each other.
what have you really got to lose man go for it.distance sucks for you i guess but if you really click after meeting maybe you guys can live closer in the future.i think its clear he likes you to so why not.
I think long distance is fine as long as its not going to be forever and as long as you do get to see each other. Sometimes I think it can be good for a relationship if it starts off slowly. If you live really close to each other there can be the temptation to live in each others pockets and see too much of each other at the start.
What would be a good way to ask him out? We probably won't see each other in person until thanksgiving so should i wait till then (not a lot of people know about him being gay, he wont tell anyone unless he absolutedly has to, which I am fine with because he said that he would be coming out to more people after awhile) or ask him now? And what would be some points to bring up about taking things slow?
I think it would probably be good to wait until you see him in person just incase you feel differently after you have met him in person. Just take it slow and see how it goes.
thats what i was thinking as well, how should i ask him to hang out? thanksgiving break isnt that long, though neither of us are particularly fond of our parents..
if you feel that strongly about it than go for it. The worst that could happen is things don't workout, and you're in the same boat you are now.
I literally just got out of the 2nd month of the 2nd year of a long-distance relationship. And by distance I mean an 18 hour drive. Ontario is really big... I hate to say it but LDRs suck. They have caused me nothing but pain, loneliness, and guilt, on top of making daily communication an uphill battle. I've even been cheated on. They just seem to bring up every problem imaginable and magnify them. AND YET PEOPLE MAKE IT THROUGH THEM. So, if you really want this to work, make an ironclad commitment. It's not easy, but being with somebody you love, might be worth fighting for. And you will have to fight, at least, that's my experience.
those are my main fears but he seems like a nice and decent enough guy to not do that, if anything im more concerned ill be the one to mess up.
People can seem one way on the internet, then once you really get to know them, you find out a whole 'nother story. I've been friend's with a chick for almost 9 years now, and thought I had completely figured her out. It wasn't until we moved in together that I really got the entire picture. I'm not saying move in to get to know each other, but I would definitely wait to meet him in person. The internet just doesn't convey everything about someone's personality. He could be a serial rapist for all you know, but you likely wouldn't feel there's something off about him till you meet him face-to-face.
You're not alone out there friend. You're part of a group that contains somewhere between 2% and 20% of the population, at the lowest end of that you're looking at 6 million people who are "out." We are legion. Keep looking, and I bet you'll find plenty to smile about
