After looking at your guide, I figure that I'm somewhere between "acceptance and education" and "support". I do need some advice, though. I live in a small town in the south, and I am friends with a female gay couple. They are wonderful friends and I don't want to do or say anything that will jeopardize our friendship. So what follows is a situation y'all are probably quite familiar with, however I have never been here before and I don't know what to do. Last week I spent several days and a couple of nights with my friends, C. and G. Their car is broke down, and I was giving them rides to town. We would get to visiting or watching movies, then if it got to late, I would just sack out on the couch for the night. C. & G. have always been very discrete around me and others, but it's obvious how much they care for each other. They left town last weekend for a couple of weeks, and I've been thinking alot about, well, everything. In the past few months, I've been asked by several people if I'm gay. To most I respond that I'm straight. However, one person who asked was G. She said that she wasn't "hitting on me", 'cause she's got C., but she was wondering. I told her that I had never tried it, but had also never eliminated it as an option. I've always wondered, because that is one of my secret fantasies, but never looked too closely. Here's the problem (finally!). The next time they call, I want to tell them that, after watching them and seeing how much they care for each other, and the fact that they are not ashamed of who they are and are, in fact, quite comfortable with their identity, I can finally accept that part of myself that I've always hidden from. I can't say that I am gay, but I do want to experiment and see. The reason I want to tell them is so I can thank them. But I DO NOT want them to feel uncomfortable around me, or feel like I'm hitting on them. :bang: So, do I tell them? What do I say? And do you think that it WILL make them feel awkward? Thanks for being here and letting me babble. I will appreciate any and all input. (&&&)
:help: Thought I'd add something to my post. I'm also at a loss as far as, "What next?" As I said, I live in a very small town, so I'm a little frustrated. :eusa_doh: I want to pursue these feelings, but I don't know how to. I'm not real comfortable doing the internet dating thing, but I don't know how to meet like-minded women. If I still lived in Dallas, I'm sure I could figure something out, but I don't. Any ideas on this? :help:
I hate to sound pushy, but I'm talking to C & G tonite, and I'd like some advice on how to proceed. I'd hate to put it off again. Thanks, and sorry to be a pain. :eusa_booh
I would love to help, but im not completely out yet either and i dont really understand your situation, sorry Good luck!
Suzi, I don't know how much help I can be - especially when it come to the "how" as I have no idea what the options are for meeting people (of any orientation) where you are... The one thing I will say is that it sounds as if you have a good friendship with this couple and if "G" is totally honest about "not hitting on you" it may be that she is asking because has seen something in your behaviour that makes her think that you are at least "curious". Quite possibly she could be doing this from a perspective of wishing to help. At the very least, because both of your friends will have faced having had to "come out" themselves, I would tend to think that they would be sympathetic and supportive if you were just honest and explained to them how you felt. If you said pretty much what you put in your post here, I really can't see that they would be likely to be anything else. I would also tend to think that, once you have explained your feelings (effectively "come out" - at least part way) to them, they could well be your best resource for find out how to meet other people. Here is a couple who ARE out in the community and it seems likely to me that they would know better than most what groups, places or other options there might be to meet like minded people in the area where you live. A lot of people in "Smalltown anywhere" don't have those sort of contacts as a starting point - including quite a few who have posted here, so I think you should try and look at that as an advantage.:icon_smil All I can say is "Good Luck" with it - and I hope your telling them your feelings reinforces your friendship and gets things moving the right way for you.
put it this way you would talk to guys and not think they where hitting on you befor you realised about yourself so why should it be any differing with c and g and they know what its like to try and come out so they should be supportive.
hi yah i have 2 friends that are dating and i spent alot of time with them this summer and they helped me alot to except that i am indeed a lesbian and at the end of the summer when it was time to leave i wrote them each a letter explaining how much they helped me this summer and that i wanted to thank them and they completly understood they didnt take it as if i were hitting on them although over the summer we often joked about if i were hitting on them but not to do with the letters other stuff but sorry im rambaling any way im sure they will understand i hope it goes well everyone likes to hear that they helped someone out.
