I developed a huge crush on my friend around 6 months ago and I can't forget her. It felt like nothing I had ever felt before. The feeling could kill me and I've been heartbroken since she couldn't admit that she had been flirting with me. I've never had this feeling with a man. I've been very happy in relationships but nothing like the feeling I had for this girl. Could it just be this girl or am I destined to experience another gay experience? I'm engaged to a man I love dearly. Please help. I'm 25.
You describe never feeling this way with a man, and yet you're engaged to one - so can you describe what your relationship with him has been like? How do you normally feel about him - are you happy with the engagement, or is it something you've been kind of unenthusiastic about for a while? Also, as far as your friend goes, when did she not admit to flirting with you (if that makes sense) - just recently? Or has it been a while ago now?
He is a wonderful man and he is there for me through thick and thin, he's amazing. When he engaged, I didn't feel amazing about it, I felt like I wanted to run away and experience more of life but I just brushed it over as nerves. I am really bad at making decisions and I always think the grass is always greener. She admitted to not flirting with me around 2 months ago now. If I'm honest with myself, I'm happy about the engagement but I'm not extatic. It just feels like something people do. I can't really be bothered planning the wedding because I want to focus on my career etc. ---------- Post added 22nd Oct 2012 at 03:01 AM ---------- I also feel under pressure to get married and have kids by his parents. They want us to settle down and have kids and be like they want us to be and that might be contributing to the way I'm feeling about it all. He can't cook/clean because his parents want a wife to do all that for him. I explained I wanted a career (I'm doing a phd) and they're just hanging on until I finish this and then we'll have kids.
His parents seem to have a very outdated idea about how marriages are supposed to work in the modern ages I don't think you can do your career AND clean the entire house AND cook every night by yourself. You may want to concider giving him some cooking lessons just in case all else fails so he can cook, too. As for the huge crush - I don't think it's very likely that it will happen again. Although that kind of depends on you. Has this ever happened to you before? If not then I don't think so. But that's just personal experience. You can get over it! You just have to wait it out. (*hug*)
I know they're really conservative. So I'm going away next year for a year, hopefully we'll settle there. Their views on sexually are also very traditional too - it says in the bible and all that. The crush thing has never happened before because I didn't realise I could be attracted to women.
