i'm 18 and definately know i am bisexual. however i'm kindof stuck in a vicious cycle and don't think its doing me any benefit. i haven't come out and dont really want to tell some of my friends / family about it til i am in a relationship / have been in a relationship with a girl. is that weird? i've kissed girls, but never had any sexual relations, some of my friends know (my closest), some don't, my parents and brother are both christian and both anti-gay, so i guess i'm worried about their reactions. and i kindof think if i delay telling them til i have more 'experience' i will feel more comfortable in doing so. so because i don't let anyone know i'm bi, i haven't really met any bi/gay girls which being involved with would make it more apparent to others and help me feel more comfortable in my sexuality. i would just love to get in to a relationship with a girl. does anyone have any advice on what to do about letting people know i'm bisexual? noone in my group of friends is gay so i guess noone really talks about the subject? i'm pretty 'girly' so i guess it isnt obvious i like girls that way either. i think i'm partly worried about reactions from other girls, as i wouldn't want anyone to act weird towards me because of it, one of my closest friends 'doesn't understand why girls fancy girls' and vocalises her disgust regularly, so i guess it kindof freaks me out into thinking everyone will have the same reaction.
i dont have all the answers ...but i love to throw my 2 cents out their inorder to try to help someone in need...from you using the word fancy...i maybe totally wrong ..but it seems like you live somewhere over in England or UK or near their...or you just like to use the word fancy like many pppl do:lol: i am not telling you to do this ..but...i would come out to your parents first if possible...that way they know that you will be dating other girls in the near future...and then have a sit down talk with this close girlfriend of yours..if shes is mature enough she will atleast listen to you and then explain what you are feeling inside....(what its like to be a gay women)...and maybe it will change her view of gay women if she realizes she liked you all along and never thought you were gay at all...many heterosexuals bash gay ppl just because they have never really known any gay men or women as close friends...most heterosexuals only hear rumors of how gay ppl ARE/LIVE from other non educated heterosexuals...and then base their view on someone elses hateful ignorant view... she may not really know anything about anything and is just going along with the crowd on the biased view of homosexuality...i would talk with her first and let her know that she is really one of you best friends and that you have to tell her somthing important..that you are gay..(thats if you want to tell her) or go on the hunt and find a nice gay girl first that you find yourself attracted too and just be with her as friends..and introduce her to your group of friends...and soon your friends will start to like her also...and your gay girlfriend will become intwined with your group of friends...and then maybe you will beable too tell your gay bashing friend that you two are infact acouple...she may open her eyes to the world and change her view from what she has learned that gay ppl are just simply ppl..who want to be loved....and see how your other good friends react as well...and if they say "thats gross...or i dont like you anymore" then they were really not your TRUE friends to begin with...let her go as well as your other friends who think the same way as your gay bashing friend does...and go make some NEW friends who are gay or not gay, but are not biased or hateful on the subject of lesbian women...hope this helps some how...:lol::lol:
So, from what I read these are the things you're currently thinking about: - You don't want to come out until you're in a relationship - You believe some of your family/friends will be unsupportive - Because no one knows you're bi, you haven't been in any relationships with girls - You act more femme than butch (pardon the stereotyping), so you don't exactly stand out as "Not Straight" - You don't want friends to reject you/treat you differently because you're gay Personally, I think it would be best if you were to come out to your family/friends before you start getting involved in a relationship. I think it will be easier to tell your parents, "Hey, I'm bi," than it will be to say, "Hey, I'm bi, and I've been seeing a girl for a month." It's best if you give them one issue to think about at a time. Also, if you want to break the cycle, I'd start with the thing you have the most control over. If you really wanted to, you could come out to everyone, tomorrow. The only thing holding you back is your fear of their rejection. Getting a girlfriend is a little more difficult. It's not something you can just do tomorrow. It will take time, and take meeting other gay/bi girls. Hopefully once you start coming out, you'll become more sure of yourself, and more stable. I would not suggest getting into relationships if you're not completely comfortable with your sexuality. So, if you want to know what I think, I think you should definitely focus on coming out, right now. You'll have plenty of time to find a girl, once you're out.
