Now, I've heard of many ways people describe how they knew they were gay; however, describing it as an urge seems unsettling. My feelings for women have always been consistent, I've never felt a sudden ”urge” to be gay or like the same sex. I was dating a girl who said that she fell in love with a man and that her feelings for the guy are stronger than any urge to be with a woman I'm confused, I cannot fall in love with a man being gay, but I guess anything is possible :dry:
I've heard this a lot from conservative people and religious folks. They don't think people are gay, they just think there are people that struggle with same-sex attraction. And like any other sins or temptations these can be fought off if you don't give in to the "urge". It's incredibly condescending and it pisses me off when people say things like that. The girl you were dating was probably a bisexual woman who was force fed this nonsense growing up and probably believes she has to suppress her same-sex "urges". By urges, it really just means desires or romantic/sexual attraction for people of the same-sex. Conservatives or homophobes just like to use urges to sound more holier-than-thou and make us look like terrible people.
Hi there! Sometimes, we go through relationships and life without realizing that sometimes, our attractions or feelings can also go the other way. I suppose it is not any different than from for example a man or woman after being in a heterosexual relationship to find out that they have feelings for the same sex, and things are cast in a different light. You know where your feelings are and that they have been consistent. I wouldn't worry too much about it.
Thanks It kinda hurts because I truly thought she was gay. I mean, that's what she told me and I thought we'd give dating another shot, but I know I have no chance. She has kids, but so do I, so I know the pressure of wanting to raise a family with both parents in the same household. I guess she is bisexual, but was struggling with who she is, she actually admitted it. As long as she's happy, I'm happy for her :eusa_liar
Hi there! I can understand why it hurts and why you might feel disappointed. If it is any help, and if she was (perhaps still is) struggling with her own feelings and coming to terms with them, it's probably for the best that it happened the way it did. It might not seem like it at this very point in time, but maybe somewhere down the road it will. Some time ago, a friend of mine once said: 'things happen for a reason.' We might not know why they happen, and we might never find out, but after a while we will realize that things have actually worked out for the better. (*hug*)
