My older sister believes that homosexuality is a sin, but she also doesn't believe it's a choice. She thinks that people can't control whether or not they are attracted to the same sex, but that they shouldn't act on their feelings. I don't understand how anyone could believe this. It's telling someone "oh, sure you can fall in love with whoever you want- but if you try to do anything about it then it's a sin." It's asking someone to live their entire life without romantic love. It's upsetting to know that she believes this because she's probably the first person in my family that I'd want to tell. And I know that she'll be disappointed and might even pity me. I'm not sure i could take that. Does anyone have this problem?
These are the same type of people who think birth control is a sin. The kids are born and they could give a rats ass. Real people of faith want you to be happy no matter what your situation. I think everyone here has this problem at one time or another. I think it's rather ridiculous to impose any belief on someone else when it comes to matters of love. You know, God is love and love is God. Denying this only causes disease and evil to manifest. I know this to be true because I have experienced this in more ways than one. Sometimes it takes a brush with death to appreciate this. In my opinion it's a universal law. Life is too short for people who don't understand love. You sister will eventually accept you.
Unfortunately, I must disagree with Zillion. I don't think most people start accepting gays in their lifetimes, we must wait for the next generation to be more accepting. But why do you have to be subject to her opinion? Why do you care if she's disappointed?
Oh yes I can relate. I grew up in an extremely conservative Catholic household. I went through the Catholic education system for 13 years. I was lectured constantly in religion class from a young age about how homosexuality was the reason Sodom and Gommorah were destroyed. I was told condoms were evil, and that instead you had to use "natural family planning." I would go around school and have arguments with democrats "calling them baby killers." Yep, I was one of those kids, because that's how I was raised. For instance, before I came out to my mother (About my sexual orientation, still haven't about gender identity) she told me we should go check out my dorm rooms I was moving into to make sure there were not "gay people living there." I am not even making this up. She voted for Rick Santorum in the Iowa caucus and entertains the idea that Barack Obama is the antichrist. My sister is almost as bad. (This is two years after coming out to her and being told that my having a boy friend was worse than her dad (my grandpa) dying). So, if it makes you feel better, you aren't alone. The good news is, I think the younger generation is a lot more likely to come around than older ones are. I wish you luck, I know the feel of not being accepted by family, and it is not a good one (*hug*)
My sister isn't hateful towards gay people in the slightest. She disagrees with homosexuality (which is unfortunate and upsetting) but she's not hateful. She has friends who are gay. She doesn't shun then or anything. My dad's more likely to that then anyone else in my family. And she's not one of "the same people who think that birth control is a sin". I'm a Christian too and agree with her on most other things, just not on this one completely. She is a real person of faith. She's just also wrong about this. ---------- Post added 31st Oct 2012 at 06:31 PM ---------- I care whether or not she's disappointed in me because she's my sister. She's family. So of course her opinion matters to me. I come from a large (imidiate and extended) family and we're all close and involved in each others lives. I've always looked up to my sister and I want her support on this.
I had a friend in high school who believed this. The thing is, she was never hateful. She would never treat someone badly for being gay, nor would she stop being their friend. Of course, this was only a friend, not a sister, so it is easier for me to deal with her disapproval. At least she won't hate you for it, and maybe she will come around when she sees that just "not acting on these feelings" isn't a realistic option.
[/COLOR] I care whether or not she's disappointed in me because she's my sister. She's family. So of course her opinion matters to me. I come from a large (imidiate and extended) family and we're all close and involved in each others lives. I've always looked up to my sister and I want her support on this.[/QUOTE] I totally understand. I think she will come around if she truely loves you. Some of my family know and it's no big deal. I slept with one of my brothers closest friends who is gay. I'm sure he told him about it. We were drunk and it just happened. Talk about awkward. So he must know. He doesn't act differently around me at all or anything. You mentioned your sister has gay friends and doesn't judge them. So that is a VERY good sign. My other brother doesn't think I'm gay but I am hinting at it. He knows I have guys around and probably wonders wtf is up with me. I've never had a girlfriend and I never want to go to the bar with him to meet 'chicks'. hahah I'd rather go to the gym and hit on dudes. But he is like your sister and is not accepting of gays. He always tells me he loves me and I love him so I doubt it will ever become an issue. I really want to tell him officially though. You should try telling your sister you love her. I've been through a lot with my brothers and we love each other very much. I'm sure its the same with your sister. But I just don't have the balls to tell them officially yet.
Well I too understand this as well, I haven't told all of my family, including one of my sisters and my Aunt and Uncle, because how they reacted when I came out as transgender two years ago. *that was SO NOT nice* So she doesn't understand why my wife and I are separated, nor why I haven't seen my Aunt and Uncle since I moved back home. I guess I am afraid to tell them, because of just how bad things were last time. The backlash was so bad that I was literally thrown back into the closet. So I can completely understand the need to tell her, and the worry of her being disappointed in you.
