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Argh!! Trans* or what?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Fallible, Nov 1, 2012.

  1. Fallible

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    So in the past I've had thoughts if being somewhere on the trans spectrum, and now I simply have no clue where I stand. I am biologically female, but I prefer to be performed as male, although I like dressing in female clothing. I think it has something to do with being raised as a female, it makes me feel small and cute. But on the other hand, it makes me feel like I'm crossdressing. The thing is, I have requested for my friend to refer to me as a male, but she hasn't at all. So that posses me off. Urgh, I don't even know what's going on. Does anyone else feel like this when it comes to gender?:icon_sad:
     
  2. Cassandra

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    It's ok to have doubts, but I think it's pretty clear that you're transgender.:icon_bigg

    I do feel somewhat like you say. Instead of choosing transgender MtF as my gender status, I chose crossdresser, because I'm still not entirely sure what I want, or where I want to "land" in my transition. I just know that I had to change, is just I don't know how much should I change.

    So, if this helps you at all, my resolution is: I decided to wait and see how my feelings develop with time. I don't know your story, but I only accepted myself some months ago, so I started to "release" my woman side little by little. I don't know if in the future I will pursue transexualism, but I do know I'm not entirely comfortable being a man, and I'm acting acording to that, so I'm crossdressing as often as I can (only when I'm in my apartment, because family doesn't know, and can't do it on work), and little by little i'm starting to see clearer.

    I know is frustrating to have to wait without an actual answer, but in due time, the right answer will come.

    For now, you seem comfortable identifying yourself as a transgender, so no need to worry (*hug*)(*hug*)(*hug*)
     
  3. DhammaGamer

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    Do you like having a vagina and breasts and a feminine voice and soft skin and no facial hair? Do you connect with women socially and enjoy their company and being treated as a part of their group?

    If so, you probably aren't transsexual. If you derive serious discomfort regarding those aforementioned qualities, then keep in mind that as long as you continue to present as female, that it will continue to be difficult for others to view and address you as male. There are plenty of ways you can dress and present as male and still keep the more polished and metro appearance. I'd say skirts and long hair are a no no for male presentation though.
     
  4. GayJay

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    I kind of get what you mean. I identify as trans and hate female body pasrt, pronouns and only really have guy friends.
    And although I only wear guys clothes now I haven't always. I didn't wear dresses or skirts or nothing but I still liked the attention I got when I wore female clothes. That was when I was about 14 though, and it faded out.
    But if your comfortable identifying as trans then do so, but your friends aren't really gonna understand you really want to be addressed as a male if you still wear girls clothing. Its hard enough for most people to get their head around anyway so I guess that will be a little extra confusing for them.
    Anyway my wall or PM is open to chat if you want.
     
  5. Fallible

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    The thing is I'm not sure whether I'm truly transgendered or or am I just saying these things because I want to be. Am I just a normal female? Or am I a crossdressing ftm guy?
     
  6. J Snow

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    I went through a lot of this kind of questioning. I actually very badly wanted to be trans, but I didn't know how to tell if I really was or not. With enough time I realized that if I spent that much time hoping I am, and that I would be crushed if I found out I wasn't, then that had to mean I was to some extent. People don't just want to be told that they have to go through transition and face persecution for it, but I wanted someone to tell me that I was trans anyway. You seem to be the same way. I didn't want to accept that I could be happy as a guy.

    Plus, its not like there is just transsexual, there are lots of people who identify outside the gender binary. It sounds to me like you have legitimate gender issues though that shouldn't be just disregarded.
     
  7. Fallible

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    The thing is that I feel that if I'd been born a boy, I would want to transition to be a girl. But maybe that's just the male crossdresser part of me. Urgh, I don't know. Am I somewhere in between male and female??