A few weeks ago a friend from work brought me home after a night out with some co-workers. I had a few drinks, wasn't drunk but wasn't capable of driving either. When we pulled in my driveway i was saying something and the minute i stopped for air, he grabbed me by my shirt and starting making out with me. I kissed him back because deep down i had always wanted that experience. After he kissed me, it went much further and involved us spending the night together. He is very attractive and is out and has been for quite a few years. The part that is bothering me is what is going on inside his head? I had asked him to meet me for a drink after work a few days later to talk to him and he agreed. When we met up we had a beer, had a few laughs, and shared a few things in common. I then asked him what made him come on to me the way he did. He told me that he could see it in me at work and instead of asking me he figured he'd "go big or go home". He even went on to say that if he got punched in the face and i jumped out of the car then so be it. He also went on to say he honestly didn't have anything going on that night. What the hell does that even mean? Was he really just curious if i was gay?? Is he interested in me? I've never known anyone who just kissed someone for the hell of it. Is this a common gay thing (no offense, as i'm questioning myself!). I really want to get in his head and figure out what is going on. We see each other at work every day, and it hasn't been awkward. I've texted him a lot as he has been my resource to whats going on in my life. Out of all the texts we've sent back and forth, yesterday was the first time he texted me first and i was beside myself; It literally made my day. So what i can't figure out is if there is potential for more? There is some space between us at work and i don't know if that's because he wants to keep it professional or if he's giving me space to figure myself out. I can't stop thinking about him and am terrified to make a move later on and lose him forever.
I don't really see the problem in trying to initiate something with him. After all he is the one who opened the door and made the first move. We don't know what his intentions were and it's anyone's guess, but I would go for it if you really like him.
What's going on? He likes you! Pretty sure that's just it. When he says he doesn't have anything going on that night...my guess on my 15 years of experience in this world is he means..."he didn't have anything going on that night". He just had nothing and was bored, and you looked fine and caught his eye, and then he got all happy happy joy joy, and the rest is...myeah. Or it could be he made time for you!...I don't know. Really, sorry. My friend (god rest his soul(he's not dead, but he feels like his time is coming(he's a YOLO kind of guy in the bad way))) knew I was bi before I even knew it myself. Then when I came to realize, he just stared at me and said: "Yeah...I know- you mean you didn't?". I don't know how, it's just people can tell sometimes. Also that text thing is cute . You could ask him those questions on the texts, he might be willing to. I would. I think he want's it professional. You don't want to loose your job over flirting with a co-worker(I don't know). If your not the type to make a move, just hint it. Say your shy, he'll get it. Later maybe if you get more comfortable and know his likes, just pop a move off to him when you think it'll work best for the BOTH of you. Best of wishes and luck!
i say go for it! Im gay and i know i wouldnt pounce on a guy just to see if hes gay. He probably wants you to make your move. Now im not saying just pounce. Give off some hints and see if he follows or doesn't. Get a closer relationship with him Good Luck Champ! (*hug*)
As my username suggests, I really have nothing to do here. Just came to say, what a cute story. Hope it turns out well.
Those were my thoughts exactly. Who just makes a move without intentions? *SIGH* But if he liked me wouldn't he text me? I got his number the morning after and he just text me last night for the first time (initiating conversation). Maybe a few quick looks at work? The other thing that's on my mind is that when i met him to talk about everything, he was worried that i would resent him, but in fact thanked him for the experience, and that i had no regrets and wasn't uncomfortable about it at all. I then tried to give him some money for the hotel room and he wouldn't take it...I know for a fact it was over $100.
sorry, I'm kind of on stalker mode...hope you'll update..I know, I know it's weird to stalk other people's love lives, but I can't help it.
Thanks everyone for your opinions. But what i can't understand is why he never tries to get in touch with me? There is really no effort on his part and that's what confuses me even more. Was he "free" for the night or did he really feel something for me? Has this situation ever happened to anyone else??
Well, I can't say this has happened to me ^^ but if I were you, I'd just go for it. Whether he likes you or not is debatable, but if you think about it, what do you have to lose? Isn't it better to just omnomnom his face and figure out for sure one way or the other? And if you'd rather not go all bath salts on him, ASK the guy! Be like "Oh hey there very hot guy I spent the night with and am seriously crushing on. I was just wondering what your deal is. Because we have one a-freaking-mazing night together, and then you don't call, you don't text, nothing! I /really/ wanna eat you up like a very delicious sundae sooo... my place, seven o'clock?"
Wait I'm confused is he gay? :O what? Did you have sex when you say "spending the night together"? I've never had someone grab me and make out with me, most times people literally go for my... Ya and I back off most of the time they were only interested In sex. So are you asking if he used you when you say he said "he didn't have anything else to do that night"? I don't know I would go for a relationship it sounds like he likes you.
He's been out for years, and yes that's what I mean. The part that sucks more than anything is he is really my only resource to this side of my life. About 6 months ago he did get out of a long relationship so now I question if I was the rebound? I've never been the hit it and quit it type so i'm really lost as to what his real intentions were. Like I said, when we got the hotel room he wouldn't let me pay him for some of it, had a jacuzzi and everything.
