Today at work I was talking to this Jamaican forklift driver, we were talking about the election, and he some how brought up gay marriage and gay rights...etc. Basically he went on the most homophobic hateful rant I have ever heard, he said he was glad that people bully gay people and doesn't know why it's illegal not to, can't believe that it is tolerated in school, and he just ripped it up. I don't know, I shouldn't care, but I felt it hard to keep the conversation going. I am closeted , and I don't think many people suspect it,especially him which is why he felt he could tell me about how fucking homophobic he is. The saddest thing is all I could do was agree with him, I want to fucking knock him out, but all I could was be spineless and agree. Again, since fucking gay rights is always on the news because of the US, it comes up to discussion on lunch, my co-workers; people I hang out with and see every day, just start giving her about gays and how gross they are....etc. Anyways my one co-worker that I kind of like, stepped in and really defended them. He hasn't dated anyone in a while; we actually share a common ex girlfriend. People say they think hes gay, but I don't really see it in any way shape or form. I tend not to like people that I think are straight, but this really changed what I thought of him. I don't even have the spine to defend homos to other people, so I don't know. I think he may be gay and I kind of want to see if I can find out. Any suggestions? He always catches eyes with me, is mostly friends with other girls, but there is just something about him that isn't gay; but then again I really don't come off as gay either though I am very eccentric and flamboyant(the real definition not the gay definition). The guy is heavily into hip-hop though; so am I, and Soccer and hockey; so am I. So I don't know. He is also black and Jehova, so I really can see how it may be hard to get it out of him. Not to sound racist but I know black families are traditionally more homophobic; and his mom and dad are both from Dominica so I know they have to be homophobic. He also is educated; goes to U of T, so he may just be genuinely accepting and heterosexual, but it is weird for someone from where I live to defend homos so publicly. But I don't know. Maybe he thinks I am gay and was just trying to make me feel better; I don't know if I was giving away my anger but my chest did start to hurt when they started going off. I had another co-worker say something homophobic in front of me than apologize, so again maybe they know and he just felt bad. I don't know, I want to know if this guy may be gay, how I can find out, and what other closeted people do when they find themselves in a very homophobic conversation. Also does anyone else have people apologize to them when something homophobic is said. I don't mean like "Im sorry I said that", I mean like more of politically correcting themselves, or saying "not that there is anything wrong with that". I've just found some of my friends and co-workers saying homophobic shit than kind of looking at me and correcting themselves. I don't mean after saying the word "gay" or "fag" but like after talking about an actual gay person if they said something mean about them they usually say "it's not because they're gay". Bleh I don't know, kind of a random blurb of text. I've been thinking hard about this the past couple days, and I kind of think everyone knows and is just letting me work it out. But then they talk about hot girls to me, going out to the bar and picking up chicks...etc, I don't know.
Well, I actually enjoy listening to homophobes now and then. I enjoy it because I can think to to myself how completely and utterly WRONG they are. I don't know why, but in some cases other people's ignorance is quite entertaining in my eyes.
^ I more meant people that you see on a regular basis. I can deal with random peoples opinions, but not someone that I respect. I respect this guy, he is my buddy almost, then he goes and says this, it kind of devastated me. I've never wanted to harm someone I liked before and this time I did.
Funny, you said something similar to help me. But, hey, I guess that the truth must be repeated, right? But, anyway, are you really going to let this Jamaican bother you? I am NOT racist, but in my area of living, we have a BAD type of black population. I know that good African American people are out there, and I will base this on the type of African Americans in my area. Again, I do not mean this as to every black person. Well, first off, tell him to keep talking to himself like that while he waits for your money to roll into his "girlfriend's" (Paid whore) Welfare savings. And besides, you could remind him of... Oh, about 140 years ago, when his ancestors were fighting a battle because of something they couldn't control, kind of like us, in fact, I found myself drawing the bisexuality symbol and writing "This is not a choice, this is not rebellion, this is not forced on me, it just is." Fun fact over, they were freed, party, and here we are today. As for all homophobes in general, over 90% of people are related to a GBLT person. Tell them this, let them process it, then walk away.
I never thought I would agree with something like this, but I have to say I, too, find it somewhat entertaining. Although, it's really only entertaining when I already have zero respect for the homophobe. If it's someone I care about, I just get angry. I have always stood up for gay rights, even before I really knew I was gay, but since I started to come out and with the election, I have become a lot more vocal about the issue of gay marriage. I had a long, drawn-out discussion with a few friends and classmates on Facebook about this issue, and a few of the people who commented were total homophobes. Toward the end of the discussion, one of my classmates (who is extremely homophobic and biggoted) decided to try to out me and said it was clear what my sexual preference was. My initial reaction wasn't fear or anger. I actually kind of laughed to myself about it. I basically responded by saying I could be straight, gay, bi, queer, etc., but trying to convince him of my sexual orientation would be pointless because he already decided for himself. I said that's the problem with closed-minded bigots--they have their thoughts and beliefs and refuse to hear others. I'm at a point in my coming out process where I really don't care a whole lot about who finds out. I don't care to hide anymore. I'll continue to stand up for gay rights and try to help those friends I care about see that homosexuality is not evil or gross. It just is.
I wish I could care enough. I have never wanted to prove anything, or been the type to enjoy adversity. I want a calm peaceful life, without problems. I just want to know how to pass it off as nothing, I have never really been one to stand up for anything or try to convince someones mindset, I don't care enough to, but I do care about what I have to hear, and if it is from someone I "respected"
We all want to enjoy a calm peaceful life with problems and I mean this with no disrespect there is no such thing. Don't take it the wrong way we all can enjoy life but it won't always be calm and peaceful. I don't stand up to homophobes because there is no point depending on how homophobic they are. I never hear bigotry at work and if I do I plan on just ignoring it. I am not gonna be at my job for long term so it does not really matter to me. If it is that bad at your job I would seriously consider finding a better one. Most people do not push their beliefs at work and should not be doing it in the first place.
Ignore it. One day homophobic people will be the minority and they will come running with their tail between their legs wondering what they've done wrong. They're just unintelligent and can't comprehend anything other than what is considered 'the norm'. I agree with those that find it entertaining, their opinions on us are just completely invalid and ridiculous.
I can attest to this, but homophobes are often, not always, secretly gay. I apologize to the community, but when I was younger, and sometimes still, I make disparaging remarks about LGBT with my friends. I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry. Repressed homosexuals become homophobic because they wanna be seen as normal. :bang:
