Hi everyone! I'm having some name trouble. I absolutely hate my birth name. I'm not transitioning or anything, but I want to change it. My birth name is uncommon for where I live but sounds just like two common names, absolutely everyone mispronounces it, and on top of that I dont think it suits me at all. I've done a ton of searching and thinking about it and even settled on a new name (Dylan). Everyone I've told so far (my closest friends and my girlfriend) all seem to think it suits me very well. So, with all this going so well, I have three questions. 1, Whats the easiest/most respectful way to bring this up to my parents? (I'm 16) 2, Its the middle of the school year, but would it be possible to request that the teachers started calling my name differently in class? Having to hear my birth name every class as they call attendance really gets on my nerves. 3, About how long should I expect it to take to adjust to the new name? Its not been very long yet, I'm not expecting any magic overnight results or anything, but for anyone who's changed their name before, how long did it take you to get used to it? Thank you
If you are feeling bad about changing your name or are having any doubts, you could always take a middle name and just go by that that way you still keep your birth name, you avoid the situation with your parents, and you can always go back to your real name should you regret it later in life
Unfortunately my middle name suits me even less... I did consider that, though. I'm pretty sure I've settled on the name, I just need tips on, you know, socially changing it. I dont plan on getting it legally changed until I'm 18, though.
Ohhh, I totally misread that. Thats an option too, but... I dunno, it just... doesn't seem right? I'd still have to go by my legal first name a lot and if I keep the name at all I know I'll never be able to get my family to respect what I want to be called.
uhm I wouldn't do it in highschool. Isn't that kind of an esoteric thing to do you would be setting yourself up to seem "weird". A name is a name it doesn't mean anything , it is narcissistic to think that a name makes the person, and that by changing your you would be improving your life. Live with what you got, try getting a nickname, I am hardly ever called by my first name even though I love my first name. How uncommon could you name be? Do you live in a racist white area? Thats the only place I could see having a weird name could be an insignificant problem. I delivered for ikea for many years and met many people with weird names, and I never thought differently of them because of their name. One persons name is Bich Tray I am not even lying.. Japjeep Ginderpreet. I SWEAR TO GOD. My cousins first name rhymes with his first name which is Ilija (ILL-E-YA), so think of that. He doesn't care, and it literally rhymes. There is no harm in any name, and to think changing a name will make you seem improved would be beyond vain. I don't think your parents would be cool with it either, it is again an esoteric thing to do. And there are no logical reasons for wanting to change a name, or humble reasons. Maybe try talking to a therapists about this? To be so ticked off by ones own name means there are some kind of rooted problems within you that may need to be solved. Everyone can see a therapist about something so this isn't meant to be an insult. It is a more realistic way of dealing with your problem, because again annoyance of a word so much definitely is something you would want to deal with psychologically because there are some deep rooted problems there. It is not healthy to be affected by a word with no negative connotations(actuary real world) in it. If your name was Fagget, or Nigger, than maybe I could see your point. So yea, don't do it, it is straight up weird, and not in a good way. I have weirdness to me that I keep to myself as well. Again all is meant to be supportive, and I am not saying I am right. Could you possibly indulge us with detailed reasons as to what specifically about your name gets you angry, how angry you actually feel, and possibly where these feelings could have come from. Or Are you just trying to find your own self, and think that by changing your name you will become more of an individual? A name doesn't make an individual, the individual does, any anyone that thinks a name makes an individual, really isn't an individual, they associate personalities and self worth with man made words. That is about as sane as saying Toronto is a bad city because most cities that start with T have high homocide rates, and the name makes me so angry.
@WooEEE Are you kidding me???? are you kidding me This was absolutely NEVER a question of IF I should change my name!!! I am noT ASKING YOUR OPINION!!!! I'm changing it, regardless of how "weird" or "narcissistic" or "vain" or "esoteric" (What a large list of insults you threw around just because I wanted to change my name! I love your intolerance, sir. Its heartwarming /sarcasm) you think it is to change something about myself I dislike. I was looking for ADVICE from people who HAVE changed their names. AND WOW GUESS WHAT THATS NOT YOU. So I wasn't asking you. At all. Not even a little. Arrite, lets go over this in a little more detail for you, so you can see what a jerk you're being. (As if that wasn't already abundantly clear) I have a name. I do not like it. When I introduce myself to people, I feel like I'm lying because the name does not feel like it belongs to me. I know, gasp, Its not just some irrational anger. Which, to be fair, I never even used the word anger. I said it got on my nerves, as in, I want to be called X but I'm being called Y. Thats a perfectly rational feeling, by the way. If someone insisted on calling you a name that wasn't yours, it might get on your nerves too. Whoops, got a little sidetracked there. As I was saying, I have to write this name on forms and receipts and my schoolwork and it makes me feel uncomfortable. The name does not feel like it belongs to me. Its like... name dysphoria. I am not vain. I do not think that there is something "better" about wanting this new name. I am not narcissistic, nor am I weird, or "esoteric." The fact that you literally spent your entire message insulting my decision shows that you are some of the above, though. You think you know what choice is better for me more than I do. Can you get any more vain? This is NOT TRUE AT ALL omg. The logical reason is I DONT LIKE MY NAME. The humble reason is I DONT LIKE MY NAME. GASP WOW I have feelings that are valid, logical, and not necessarily humble or not. Because they are feelings. That I have the right to feel and act on. I want to repeat IM NOT THAT PISSED OFF BY MY NAME. It just makes me uncomfortable, in that it does not belong to me. Its like if I was called "Jake" or "Elizabeth" or something like that. I dont have ANY PROBLEMS with the name other than its NOT MY NAME. I do not care about your opinion. I do not care if you think I'm weird in a bad way. I really dont. Your opinion means nothing to me. Thank you for absolutely not helping at all, and not answering any of my questions. Also yes, I am being rude but also keep in mind that you answered a question not directed at you, to be rude to someone who was only looking for help. So you got what was coming to you.
