Sorry if this is in the wrong bit. So its been a year since I've met these people and its been great and I feel like I've been finally living life (sorry if that sounds cheesy lol) like I do feel close to these people but I don't feel like an equal. Like I think because I look up to them so much and think I'm clingy I feel inferior. Also I'm kind of the baby of the group so sometimes I do feel like I'm acting like the younger brother trying to impress their older brother/sister It's not their fault its just I'm so insecure and I always imagine the worst. Ie if I text them, I'm bothering them and I'm being clingy. I do get paranoid also but that's because I'm so insecure.
Why do you feel inferior to your friends? As long as you're being real then I don't think you should have to try to impress them. And they're no better than you are, and just because you're younger it doesn't make you any less of a person. I know how it feels to be insecure, it sucks, but I've learned that there is only one me in this world and that makes me unique. There's only one sunnii and you're somebody who they care about and I'm sure they value your friendship. Once you start believing how awesome you are, you will start to gain confidence. I can be clingy too, but I'm working on it, most of the time I absolutely dread being alone.
Thanks Xx. I am someone who when I like someone or something I become like their biggest fan. I'm used to idolizing people on tv and I have had friends but not as close as this group so this is the 1st like group of people I really look up to. You never really know what people truely think. Even though I've had people tell me how much they like me I'm still so insecure. My life has moved so far forward in the past year but I'm probably more insecure than ever with such low-self esteem. They've actually asked me about my self-esteem and I can't really put my finger on what it is. Only thing I can think is I'm "ashamed" of how much of a lack of a "life" I had and that they're all I really have. And the fact that theyre essentially "work friends" (but I tell myself we wouldn't be so close if we were just "work friends") its like I live to work not work to liveand it doent help I'm not great at my job (I know I sound like I'm putting myself down but I really am quite crap lol)
