After years of soul searching and questioning my sexuality, I've finally come to the realization that I'm gay. When I was younger I started having gay thoughts and fantasies - I had hoped they were part of a funny phase I was going through and would disappear, however instead of disappearing, they became more frequent and intensified and I began to realize that I could be either gay or bisexual. I found that calling myself bisexual was much easier to deal with at the time, but I have since discovered that I am gay and not bisexual. Although I now identify myself as being gay, I am still finding it difficult to come to terms with it, one moment I am excited at the prospect of being able to explore my new found sexuality, and then the next moment I feel sad and depressed about it. I'm looking forward to the time when I can eventually be comfortable with my sexuality. How do I come to terms with being gay so that I can get on with living my life?
something that helped me was simply saying to myself "i'm gay." even having known all my life it took me a long time to fully understand it, and i was surprised that it surprised me when i realized that i really am gay. what exactly are you thinking when you feel sad and depressed? you don't have to post that answer here if you don't want to of course, but be aware of your thoughts the next time you're feeling anything negative towards your sexuality. try to hold onto the feeling of excitement, because it really is wonderfully exciting to get to know yourself.
Being gay is one aspect of who you are. But there is so much more to us than just our sexualities. I understand what you mean when you go through up and down phases. What helped me to come to terms with my sexuality was that it made me happy to think of myself as different. There is nothing wrong with that! I always thought that being gay was kind of like being special....it makes you unique. Surround yourself with positive representations of being gay. It is hard but try and keep the negativity out. But if you feel sad and depressed sometimes, just imagine your future goals and future hopes. And slowly you'll grow into yourself and before you know it! You will be cozy and comfy with your sexuality. That always helps me. Hope this helped in some way.
Welcome to the group Andy. I shared your feelings - great one minute, stressful as you know what the next!!! But I am so glad I finally bit the bullet,as it was, and came out. Much later in life than I should have (37 or so) but that is another story. As for loving myself, as I am - I like most people am I work in progress. Good Luck - keep us posted!
