To Explain a Lifestyle (or lack thereof)

I've recently been weighing a decision to openly express my feelings of same-sex attraction, and with it comes a little problem.

My mother is fairly open-minded, and while personally disfavors the 'homosexual relationship', ultimately accepts that different people and different generations will change in what they approve of.

My father meanwhile is generally intolerant of any mention of homosexuality; while the severity of his intolerance is not total, it is still present enough to bring with it all the stigma, stereotypes and misconceptions that come far too often in our society.

My primary concern in "coming out" is properly conveying the extent of my feelings. I feel that any overt mention of "homosexuality" will lead to an assumption that I will assume a 'homosexual lifestyle'. I currently do not hold much sexual interest, so I feel that if this assumption is drawn, it would only hurt the situation. I understand the concern of being 'misunderstood' when coming out is quite common; however, any specific advice on how this might best be avoided would be greatly appreciated from experience.

Furthermore, do my continuing doubts about sexual interests make it pointless to 'come out'? Undoubtedly, 'coming out' will be a great stress to my family, one I do not want to bring in my own confusion.

After some 'exploration" in gender identity as a child, I was told that if I provided reassurances of my lack of homosexuality, it would help to lessen rejection from my father in particular. At the time, I told my mother I was not homosexual, so I feel a sort of ethical obligation to let my mother in particular know if that has changed. Doing that, however, entails much more than honesty.

So, how might it be suggested that I approach this? Should I try to confront the issue or wait? Am I 'certain enough' about my lifestyle?

I know all to well many of these questions only I can truly answer, but any experiences or suggestions would be greatly helpful.

Thanks.

 

Probably more refering to eventual marriage of a homosexual partner than anything else. Having an active sexual/personal relationship with another man.

I'm not a fan of the designation- it carries about as much truth as a uniform "heterosexual lifestyle"-which doesn't exist.

 

I'm worried what they might falsely assume about my desire to form relationships.

Marriage is strictly between a man and a woman here.

 

I am worried about confusion. Right now, I have little interest in forming any relationship and I feel suddendly communicating my attractions to members of the same-sex may mislead.

They will assume I plan, in the future, to pursue some form of extended relationship when that may not be what I even have in mind.