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for girls , do you feel "straighter" when in "customer service persona"?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by tapsilog2012, Dec 5, 2012.

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  1. tapsilog2012

    tapsilog2012 Guest

    So the other day at work this very attractive man came in (a new client for the yoga studio). He was obviously flirting with me and the other girls there.

    Normally I find this anywhere from mildly annoying to absolutely obnoxious, depending on the aggressiveness of the flirting. But for some reason when Im in "customer service persona" its like I have accessed this whole other mindset that doesnt mind and even likes this kind of attention.

    Because Im still questioning (sort of), on the RARE occasion I find a guy very attractive I try to imagine having sex with him. (Im sure this guy would be happy to know, thats what I was thinking as I gave him a mat and took his payment :rolle:slight_smile:. And because I was in the "vapid, I'll do anything to please mindset" I go into when Im in customer service mode I thought that I probably could have sex with him and wouldnt mind it.

    Ive been kind of confused after this encounter though. Could I really be bisexual? The "urges" I get towards men are very different to women.

    Women, I will see an attractive one and want to jump on her and do everything to her. Men, if there is one that is very attractive and is flirting with me, I imagine him asking me out, imagine "going on a date and maybe we end up having sex", and its "ok with me". Its like my body isnt entirely rejecting it but the intensity of the feeling is nowhere near the same as it is with women.

    It almost seems like I am responding to their attraction, I feel attracted to them because I am desired by them. Wheras with women, I just desire them. With men I am the object, and women, the subject.

    Thoughts?
     
    #1 tapsilog2012, Dec 5, 2012
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 5, 2012
  2. Beachboi92

    Beachboi92
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    I can't speak for girls but for some reason when I serve people or am doing customer service things I usually get gayer when I am dealing with woman (my voice goes up 3 octaves etc) and the opposite when I am dealing with men *shrug* the only time I don't do that is if I am doing activist things.
     
    #2 Beachboi92, Dec 5, 2012
  3. PinkTractor

    PinkTractor
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    Customer service is all about reading a person as quickly as possible, and trying to make yourself as pleasant as possible to them, as quickly as possible--it's like trying to be a psychic chameleon, I think. It's pretty much the opposite of being your most authentic self, unless you get the very rare customer who could possibly turn into a real life friend.
    I wouldn't rely too much on what happens when you're in customer service mode, it's a mind warp.
     
    #3 PinkTractor, Dec 5, 2012
  4. myheartincheck

    myheartincheck
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    Well personally speaking, I enjoy being in the presence of flirtatious people. I like when I feel attractive to someone regardless of age/gender/fitness/appearance. That doesnt mean I'd sleep with them though. I'm just flattered if someone likes or is attracted to me. It's good for moral you know. :grin:
     
    #4 myheartincheck, Dec 5, 2012
  5. tapsilog2012

    tapsilog2012 Guest

    As I wrote my post above, I realized something that is always the difference between how I feel about attraction to men vs. women, so Ill repeat it here.

    With men, I am the object, and women, the subject.

    In other words, with men, if I can tell they are flirting with me, (and are not gross/too old/too young or whatever) I may feel a bit of attraction. But with women, I can feel attraction to them without them reciprocating at all.

    @Pink Tractor I agree customer service is a total mind warp. You spend long enough in it and you will have absolutely no idea who you are and what you are feeling. Someone should do a study on that....
     
    #5 tapsilog2012, Dec 6, 2012
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 6, 2012
  6. Carm

    Carm
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    This makes sense 150% percent. With men, it's accepting the attention, with women, it's giving the attention and is often completely unsolicited and most often uncontrollable. I think you're wise to have identified this.
     
    #6 Carm, Dec 6, 2012
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