My friend says he's straight and I believe him and he knows I'm gay but, yesterday (not the first time this has happened) me and a few people were sitting in my friends apartment and my friend X who I think is gay and I was basically sitting on top of me on a couch fit for 3. Yes there was a third person on the couch but, he sat next to me with my right leg touching his left leg but, there was room on the couch to easily move over a few inches. Then constantly he would have to move his hands around when talking just to brush his hand off my leg. So, while we were all watching the movie out of nowhere my friend got pissed and said some random shit left and went into his bedroom. I don't get it he always has to stare at me for at least 3-5 seconds when I'm not looking and then when I do stare back at him he stays in eye contact for 2 seconds then turns away. He likes to randomly try and wrestle with me on occasion. He always trys to bump into me. Whenever he sees me or I'm around him he also has to always keep moving like something is on his mind you know like, biting his nails, moving his leg, constantly fidgeting. Am I making sense of this in the right way? Edit: If he knows I'm gay then why would he provoke me? Unless that's just my paranoid state of mind. Edit 2: Everything I'm saying has also been done before I told him I was gay. He won't do the same to anyone else, doesn't act as dominant towards other people and sure as hell talks differently to me than others. It just happens way more often (except the wrestling) Not to mention I'm possibly moving in the same apartment next semester.
That stuff doesn't really indicate that he's gay. He mostly just sounds/acts like a regular, playful guy friend. But I guess if you really want to find out, then ask him. The next time he does something that you feel is odd behavior, then say something along the line of "What are you doing? Do you like me or something?" in a joking manner. Or, you could "make a move" like the title suggests. However I would be careful since you don't want to ruin your friendship or make things weird. I'd only do it if you feel very strongly that there's a good chance he might be gay/like you.
I agree with this. However I would try the former before the latter, and I'm not too sure about a jokey manner. If you do it in a jokey way then he may feel as though it's a joke to you, so even if he is gay and into you, he may feel compelled to act as though it was a joke. But as Lance stated, be careful how you proceed, because you don't want to lose your friend over an awkward moment, make sure you're sure. All the best.
Tell him if he's not careful, he'll turn you on Be only half-joking so he can take it either way. I think very often straight people don't really "get" it how they can turn on gay people because it's not in their experience base. The same as gay people don't understand how straight people can be touchy-feely and "flirty" and not mean anything by it.
I agree with everyone. Don't be TOO serious when asking him. I had a friend who did just the same things you mentioned. I approached the matter like it was the end of the world. RESULT; he freaked out and never spoke to me....ever. So be really cautious!
I have a question. Do you have a crush on him? Sometimes (and I'm a victim of this too) when we have crushes on people we think every little thing is a hint that the person likes us back. Could this be the case?
Yes, I'm into him. Only reason why I still bother is because he hasnt tried to bang any girl yet in college nor try and pursue a girl and it's been a year and a half while at school. Always saying "I'm trying to find a faithful girl". I just find it bullshit when almost every other guy I know is always out on Friday nights or whenever trying to find a girl to mess around with.
So, now all nice guys must be gay? Sure must suck to be straight then. I find that incredibly contradictory to the common theme that all gay guys are supposedly dicks...
My friend and long-time (now ex) crush at university was like that. Nice guy, got along great. He never gave me any gay vibes but I always hung onto the possibility that maybe he wasn't straight because he wasn't chasing after girls. A few weeks ago he confided in me about him crushing on a mutual (girl) friend of ours. Sure, maybe he was lying, but all the feelings he was describing were parallel to what I felt towards him while I was crushing. It seemed believable enough for me. And I know when I was closeted and someone asked me about feelings for a girl, I couldn't come up with anything nearly that well thought-out. Sadly, we live in a society where people are straight until proven otherwise. So it's generally easier to assume someone's straight. Statistically speaking, 19 or so out of every 20 guys you meet will be straight. I'm going to keep running with that ideal because it saves me a lot of trouble. I'm not going to gamble when those are the odds I'm playing with.
