I finally found a GSA-type group on my college campus. It's called "A Forum For Gay and Straight Students," and the discription on Facebook (how i found it) is: The 'fun' thing about it for me right now is I haven't 'officially' come out to anyone, yet. I've got a feeling that people will at least ask when I'm at the group, and I'm debating whether I will tell them or not, yet. So far, there has only been one meeting, which was more of a "hang around and get to know people" thing than an actual meeting (those start next week). When I was there, there were a few guys who I labed as definately being gay, but there were just as many (if not a few more) that I had no idea. I'm really curious what percentage of people there are glb and what percentage are straight. I'm sure I'll figure it out as the meetings progress who is what, but right now, I'm just curious. I think the only way I'll ever know for sure is if we go around in a circle. I do have a reason for posting this, although it may not have seemed like it. I'm thinking that as I'm going to this group, word might get out to those that I know that I'm gay (or that there's suspicion that i'm gay). Do you think it would be better for me to just let word leak out, or should I just go and tell people myself?
My personal opinion is that I think it might be ok for the word to leak out to people you don't know very well but as for the people you have known for a while if not years I think its best if you come out and tell them face to face because I think in the long run its better if they hear it from you yourself whether then hearing it from another person as a suspicion or rumor I think it will make them feel better that you had the courage to face them and tell them yourself not to mention it would probably make you feel better then if you just let people talk. It will definitely lift more weight off your shoulders if you did it yourself especially people that your really close too its a huge accomplishment. Good Luck!!!
I agree with bilove. If you're attending such a group, there are going to be people who suspect that you're gay or bi or generally not straight. However, if they know you through the group, they are probably the type of people who: a, don't care either way; b, are supporters of glbt people; or c, are glbt themselves. So, if you let word leak out through the group, you'll generally be in good company.. On the other hand, if someone might find out about you through the grape vine and they are a generally close friend, they might be hurt that you didn't tell them. If they are supportive, then they'll probably understand why you didn't raise a rainbow flag.. But, you might try picking some of your closest friends and seeing how it goes..
Maybe this is naive of me but I cannot imagine there are that many "ally" guys who would bother to attend such a meeting. Not that there aren't a lot of supportive straight guys out there but there's supportive and then there's willing to spend one's time at a meeting. Plus I would like to think that there would be at least 50% of the people there who did not register as stereotypically gay.
That's a good point. I never thought of it that way. Yah, now I just need to find a good time to come out to people, without trying to feel like I'm rushing myself...
