now, first thing you should now: I haven't told anyone anything yet. And: I'm pretty sure that I'm gay, maybe bisexual. So I read some threads and so on and now I'm almost positive that I'm actually gay. But I have this problem: I want to tell somebody, a lot of people say that it helps to tell someone. The person that comes in min is my best friend. I've only known him for about 1,5 years, but It feels like 10. His parents love me, even talked about maybe travveling with me and my parrents, they haven't even met yet! So it sounds easy no? just tell him. I wish it was as easy as that. My friend is straight, I'm 95% positive, first I though there would be a bigger change, but one day he talked aout hating guys in porn and that he found this website where it was porn with only girls. Why is this a problem? Short: I fell in love with him, I think of him al the time, I'm happy when I am with him and so on. I'm really positive (almost) that it is love and not just "best friends". That actually made me realise that I am really gay, the thought crossed my mind, but now I'm prety sure becuase of that. now, I want to tell him that I'm gay, telling someone looks like it would feel good. BUt should I also tell him that I'm in love with him? We are best friends, so I wouldn't want to lose him. I'm sure he would stay my friend if I told him, but I think things will change. He lives some ways away from me, so when I go to him, I sleep there, He has a dubble bed, so I sleep next to him. Maybe that'll get unconfortable for him and I'll need to sleep somewhere else or something so: if I tell him that I'm gay, should I also tel him "and I know this becuase I fell in love with you", or should I just leave that out? Should I even tell him? Should I hope on that little change that he would like to try a gay relationship? this is all really hard for me, I'm only 16 and this is one of those friends where you're sure that you'll still be friends when you're like 50. So what should I do? I really don't know :'(
I wouldn't tell him that you love him. That is a bit much, not only because he also has to take in the fact that you are gay, but also because he is more than likely straight and unable to reciprocate those feelings back to you going by what you've said. I would encourage you to come out to him, but not say that you love him. I don't really think it would get you anywhere and might make things pretty awkward between you guys.
Dont tell him you like him- it would ruin your friendship (in all likelyhood), and youd be setting yourself for sadness. He's straight so you can never be with him like that. Keep him as a friend (and tell him your gay, it does help to tell someone). But just be happy being friends and if he asks assure him you dont like him.
If he is straight, there is no point in telling him that you love him. I'm in the same position, but I would much rather keep him as a friend than ruin it by telling him. Tell him your gay though, it really does help to have that support from a friend.
I'll only second what's been said so far. You can come out to him, but don't tell him you love him - it most probably won't get you anywhere. I know how hard it is to have those feelings for a close friend. I've been in a similar situation for years... But like Lewissss, I'd rather keep the friendship. Hope everything turns out well for you.
thanks, this really helped, I though the same, only telling him I'm gay (probably), but I just kept thinking of the maybe, maybe he isn't gay to or something, but you guys are right. I'll only tell him about the gay part, maybe, one day. The problem is, I'm almost sure that I'm gay, all the signs are there, but a part keeps telling me "what if your wrong, there's no turning" back. I'm thinking of telling him that I'm bisexual, I even may be, but then if it turns out that I'm not gay, I'll still have the option open, or is this bad to do?
I Told My Best Guy Friend I'm Gay I'm only 14 years old and i'm gay. I have this friend who is probably not like any other guy i met. He is so sweet and caring. I also happen to mention that im in love with him. Today on 5-2-14 at school i told him i was gay. I thought he was going to spill out and tell everyone but he didn't, but he did seem suprise that i told him. I then felt sad for the rest of the day and he gave me a pat on the back. I thought he would be one of those people that he would stay away from me and not talk to me but he wasn't. His locker is near mine and i told him "do me a favor... please dont tell anyone what i told you" he then said "I won't". As i got home from school i was scared to think that he didnt want to talk to me. Later on that day i told him " Do you hate me, now that you know my sexuality?" he replied " Not at all we still good friends". This made me cry knowing that he still likes me as a friend and even doesn't care about if im straight or not. I love him so much and i always will <3.(*hug*)
I told myself I wasn't going to allow myself to be gay, I had g/f's even had sex with them. I was hiding this huge secret about myself from me, once I was outed by a gay cousin my life did get easier. A few guys tried to talk shit to me I just informed them there wasn't going to be any monkeyshine going on here so don't worry about it they both laughed. I had issues adjusting of course but my close friends had my back. I was in a LTR until I was sick and didn't make enough money for my ex's needs so then he left me. I think we all go through changes so hold on to your friend and do not hit on him if you do you might lose him as a close friend. I did want to say its up to you whether you come out or not. take care hugz
